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覺得你可以加多一點對周圍環境的描繪,在前幾篇我已經有這種感覺,我腦海中有他們打鬥的畫面,但打鬥的場景卻不太能想像到,就像…兩個人打架打得很激烈,但背景是黑白的,偶爾有幾棟樓,其他就要自己腦補
哈哈但我不是專業的,只是路過說兩句,整體來說我挺喜歡這個故事,唯獨希望能更有畫面感
寫作加油~~o(≧v≦)o