220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGn71KTldk
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRdobAH6H2o
和喜歡Kelvin的女生進行了一場不愉快的對話後，我便到了學校門口會合Kelvin：「行得。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrYwNCpbuAo
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Plu5SBah1
「咁耐嘅？」他問。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyG45lmiam
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkG197xGGM
「嗯。」想要放鬆心情的我說：「不如今日去掃街，肚餓想食啲嘢。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBMcKiW7fY
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGwb7kDoOA
「好阿。」Kelvin和我並肩而行。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhtOGY1yat7
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxXLZ5KjwH
這不是我第一次和Kelvin單獨放學，可是我的心情竟然緊張起來。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn09uKVAnHE
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaFY8uREH4y
自從被同學懷疑我和Kelvin、古榮的關係後，我的心便不再單純。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGAQGdq1BNa
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLC67lY3Fr
我開始思考，難道我對他們抱有愛情的感覺而沒有察覺？到底怎樣才算是愛情的喜歡？220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcmR2K8mDQ
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTacaka0is6
我仔細打量Kelvin的側臉。他有一顆性感喉核、單眼皮、微卷頭髮、手臂有因為勤力做運動而得來的小肌肉、永遠不願穿得整齊的校服。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNk1yPZkqCh
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡStmwLDmOiS
我第一次有這種想法——每天見面的Kelvin外型其實不錯，能夠和他去掃街真幸運。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9cj2V6ZRw
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmomlWuWDx
人的想法很微妙，明明沒有事情發生過，我跟Kelvin本來就會相約一起放學和掃街，只因為幾句說話便能扭轉一個人的想法。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCdpw6hOft
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHcuILF97H
想法塑造習慣，習慣就是生活。一個人的想法非常重要，光用腦袋便能改變自己對世界的觀感。難怪校長時常訓話，學生必需留意自己說話的用詞。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PXiEjMq62
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLjHeCwL5T
爸爸吸毒後會有這種感覺嗎？生活過於苦悶無新意，對身邊本來平平無奇的東西，從無到有，誕生了快感。就像吃完精神鴉片，內心一陣飄飄然。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUahmeit2JD
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYEYJvpTH1
「喂。」Kelvin打斷我的發情，還伸手摸摸我的額頭：「你係咪唔舒服？塊面咁紅嘅？」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxmi6G7gki
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsB1qhDpQWG
「咳咳⋯」我因為吞了一半的口水，嚇得狂咳。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVa4DFl05By
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYcpOhbP1p
Kelvin拍拍我的背：「洗唔洗早啲返屋企休息？」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLnCn3FQSa
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2mdsxYuc3
「唔洗。我吞口水唔小心瀆親姐。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeBKwZrC4I
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCoMJAV9PF
「咁蠢嘅人都有，你陣間食燒賣小心啲。」說話一啖砂糖一啖屎是Kelvin的特色。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7IXM778ys
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwb3p6tMhY6
我站在Kelvin旁，一邊吃撈麵，一邊等待著我的芋圓鮮奶茶。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmeDSb5JQO
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvT2Yq3T3Jz
腦中是各式各樣的幻想。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLie3FP8Z2Y
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQTz1ZhN0E
如果我跟Kelvin談戀愛，會一直感受到這種飄飄然嗎？220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuYQZjaiyK
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAb3vtYs8f
如果會，戀愛似乎不錯。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6cYmU8MTg4
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hucf2jQdz
「琴日睇新聞好爆阿，韓流巨星宣佈退出樂壇。」Kelvin說。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpAOzvcUQH1
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpFlB2aQYd
「係咩？我無留意。」我通常聽本地音樂，對外國音樂不熟悉。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJPIvGggNB
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kfcgFz9Li
「原來佢做龜公，開間酒吧做毒竇，仲有堆明星朋友喺Group share落藥迷姦嘅片段，好痴線。」Kelvin說。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwlp1Cke3X
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeD9fjpsaY
「咁癲？佢好似都幾紅。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2F7Mna2s3q
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBcml9fXgS
「真係無樣睇。好彩你唔迷呢啲韓星。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSaXc6d01S
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbaE9pxpjVB
「點解咁講？」我問。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6JUdIoiP16
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDSWvA2AfmX
「鐘意埋啲衣冠禽獸就傷心囉。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡugs0R3L7LJ
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDj9OB83Ar
「我問你一條問題阿。如果你識人吸毒，仲會唔會同佢做朋友？」Kelvin的話題讓想起我的爸爸。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxjGTVq8RO
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FM8MOnptj
「唔會，我唔會接受。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjwnra86AtK
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMLGZI0eE3
「如果係你朋友嘅屋企人吸毒呢？」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDWWyBAOfh
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGJzk7TfNPq
「咁就難講。」Kelvin說：「佢出入屋企品流複雜。我會盡最大努力幫佢，等佢唔好誤入歧途。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnEJ16jhvh
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1tAnMOanf
我從來沒有嘗試幫助爸爸，鼓勵他離開黑社會：「屋企人吸毒，唔係朋友本人吸毒，唔代表會誤入歧途嘅。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNT4tHBNA9
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7AItaPJO4
想來爸爸也是身不由己賺錢還債，以他的能力除了保安、洗碗也沒有工作適合他，沒有站在他的立場勸喻也是種偽善。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLblkCYFmii
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbaxqvn1TK2
「係好容易呀！如果你老竇喺房食冰隊草，你喺廳都會聞到啦，毒品喺你眼前，又會心郁郁想試。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ3fOJ6M7cJ
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsLgAoaNVyz
「你唔係好鐘意幫人㗎咩？」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1flBD9rWV
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKVz8ykKwY
「阿婆行動不便，點可以相提並論！吸毒對我嚟講無咩討論空間！你話我歧視都係咁講，同賭錢一樣，無人拎住支槍迫佢，累己累人。幫過對方拒絕就算，連朋友都唔會做。留返俾專業嘅機構幫手。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnvqezwGFy
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaj2ZdaBld
Kelvin的說話打破了我和他戀愛的幻想。跟正義的Kelvin坦白父親有吸毒習慣絕對是一件自掘墳墓的事。他會討厭我的家庭，管東管西，而需要倚賴父親生存的我在成年前也無法解決家庭背景的問題。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuM9Q6WZewC
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2T8ybNqG4
他無意的批評讓我內心不舒服。我是受害者，也很討厭自己的家庭阿！可是家庭的影響一直都在，它就像一道封印在身上除不掉的詛咒。無論是自己、抑或他人，同樣避之則吉。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXGHJrppcd
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCC78CzRx2
我寧願沒有開口詢問，沉醉在五分鐘前的粉紅色泡泡裡。我忘記了我和Kelvin是對難以找到共識卻常常一起的朋友。現在的我失去了幻想，變得更自卑了。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCKezkwpMt
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOEgA2Qssp
我和Kelvin的關係並不穩固，他會隨時離棄我。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UtQjBoxFI
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMUFBG4DfI
婚姻的承諾都能推翻，更何況是乳臭未乾的戀愛。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivaXAKULYq
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF2afKz6n10
「點解人係群體動物？點解人要互相來往？」我喃喃自語：「係自私，係計算？兩個人，一定係有利益先會走埋一齊。世界上根本冇無私嘅愛。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7nVqzSUdew
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mOCQ0b8Ww
「咁功利，一齊開心唔得咩？」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVp0SEhK3J0
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUccDtRaoF
「開心都係一種利益。可能對方人緣好，帶自己去認識朋友；可能係對方博學多才，學業上幫到自己；可能係自己孤單，想有人陪伴自己。總之就係因為利益開始，互相需要，到咗某一日，唔再幫到大家，就自然分開。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqt2IgGoWOL
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXSQmKvlO4
我為未發生的事情擔憂。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLEYTW9Jn5
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZU51VHlQvu
面對關係看得見的分岔，倒數著珍愛的關係終會消逝，無力感擴散。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6WMUL0XMd
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkEgQP8fR79
「你今日做咩事咁多愁善感？」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZJghsjyFu
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19z6n8bxAY
「無呀。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIChA91Ok6M
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdDXOzFXjeQ
「我知啦，思春期！中二病！」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6OoF1u23rQ
220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUf2AurkGJ
「唔知呀！你話係就係啦。」220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjhpmVTildV
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人生就是各種徒勞無功的零碎。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc2XAZEtItY
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難過。220Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqypFy4sOR
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