保母車照例送她回家,在熟悉的巷口停下。星野莉奈道了謝,自己拎著包包下車,朝家的門口走去。22Please respect copyright.PENANAPgmmMoA2pl
22Please respect copyright.PENANAc10WC7Pg8K
夜裡的風很輕,路燈把影子拉得很長。她聽見鞋跟在路面上輕輕敲出的聲響,一聲一聲,孤獨得像在空白的紙上打字。22Please respect copyright.PENANA8UX8yUbqrC
22Please respect copyright.PENANAo4AhXgrvxA
進了家門,星野莉奈換上室內拖鞋,動作輕得幾乎聽不見聲音。22Please respect copyright.PENANAFinItQYog2
22Please respect copyright.PENANAyEpnJepuXi
包包放在玄關的小桌上,她頓了頓,還是小心地擺正,把背帶理順。22Please respect copyright.PENANAoUFEwWuc1f
22Please respect copyright.PENANAc6n0yOZAKD
外套掛好,扣子一顆一顆扣上。收拾得,像在收拾自己。22Please respect copyright.PENANA11jIwwIZK3
22Please respect copyright.PENANA4DpQID4xEh
她取出放在外套口袋裡的手機,走到客廳,放在長桌上,靜靜坐下。22Please respect copyright.PENANArbJrlfxGjL
客廳很安靜,只有冰箱運轉的低鳴聲在耳邊繞。22Please respect copyright.PENANAIptiXnXDoK
22Please respect copyright.PENANAqiUASlXKaK
星野莉奈抱著膝蓋,坐在沙發的一角,手指輕輕摳著自己衣服上的線頭。22Please respect copyright.PENANA5RySsFBdoh
22Please respect copyright.PENANAlGlNN7Vblb
過了很久,她才伸手拿起手機。22Please respect copyright.PENANAida5g31E7q
22Please respect copyright.PENANANigwoKOkus
打開通訊軟體,滑到最上方那個置頂的對話框。22Please respect copyright.PENANAhheBG3l3bo
22Please respect copyright.PENANAKL1ARpNSFb
上一次的訊息還停留在五天前,在他們要去球賽前,只有一行簡短的「你在球場上的樣子真的超帥」。22Please respect copyright.PENANAJVhiGJOI6U
22Please respect copyright.PENANAIFy2qn6j25
只有已讀標記,沒有新的回覆。22Please respect copyright.PENANAy0DiEWPX8w
22Please respect copyright.PENANAoe7VlzD3cl
她盯著那個對話框看了很久很久。指尖滑動到輸入欄,敲了幾個字,又慢慢刪掉。22Please respect copyright.PENANAxzBpEYZq9h
22Please respect copyright.PENANAs0902wnVJ3
想說什麼呢?22Please respect copyright.PENANAHUcGmFXLyx
說「你看起來很好」嗎?22Please respect copyright.PENANAnhLpGbBTpO
太多餘了——他會看到,但也不一定會回。22Please respect copyright.PENANAjR8EucxaQB
22Please respect copyright.PENANAhBujeom97L
說「我今天也有努力喔」?22Please respect copyright.PENANAsEImmcyO81
會不會像是在邀功?要期待人家回什麼?22Please respect copyright.PENANA4eanBudENg
22Please respect copyright.PENANAyZtoBckav7
還是問「你的比賽怎麼樣」?22Please respect copyright.PENANAbn2q1g5elB
「你有沒有揍那個前鋒了」?22Please respect copyright.PENANAOXLhAIdU4J
22Please respect copyright.PENANA3yreGyI54T
可是他可能沒空詳細說他們的賽況;也沒有理由真的去揍那個前鋒。22Please respect copyright.PENANAtEFLipi0W2
22Please respect copyright.PENANAdzI31eU8uk
那——要不要乾脆只傳一個表情符號?22Please respect copyright.PENANAXJxIhwDMo4
一個不會被誤會、也不會太明顯的微笑?22Please respect copyright.PENANALHRGBkus3B
22Please respect copyright.PENANApjQHRR02fd
還是——22Please respect copyright.PENANAtnMdbvph2Q
什麼都不說,只顯示上線狀態,讓他知道,她還在這裡。22Please respect copyright.PENANADYqW7weoJQ
22Please respect copyright.PENANAkn5OnJfsDI
還在這裡,一個人。22Please respect copyright.PENANAwh6IM0GkeQ
22Please respect copyright.PENANA3PXLBNAsFR
手機螢幕因為長時間沒有操作,自動暗了下來。22Please respect copyright.PENANALFEYMUj1RV
22Please respect copyright.PENANAMtPg3Jq1nj
星野莉奈沒有再打開。22Please respect copyright.PENANAyUj2WOS22E
她把手機翻面扣在桌上,怕再看到什麼,又怕什麼都沒有。22Please respect copyright.PENANAfZxKAxEhZ4
22Please respect copyright.PENANAcerB8C4qV0
然後,她慢慢縮回沙發的角落,把自己抱得更小。22Please respect copyright.PENANAByo1IWeN0H
外面的風輕輕吹過陽台的門縫,帶來一點夜裡的冷意。22Please respect copyright.PENANAb5K2JTH7fJ
22Please respect copyright.PENANAcKAzeWMgsW
她靠著沙發背,閉上眼睛。22Please respect copyright.PENANADcjtbpN8zS
22Please respect copyright.PENANAIZfDKyfQgi
沒有哭。22Please respect copyright.PENANA78CoXTYNRo
22Please respect copyright.PENANAFi1fMWGYX4
也沒有期待誰會來敲門。22Please respect copyright.PENANAOi7fJuX5WC
只是靜靜地,和自己待在這個空蕩蕩的客廳裡。22Please respect copyright.PENANAUCQ9yNoseH
22Please respect copyright.PENANAI5kHNzJy6r
就像很多個夜晚一樣。22Please respect copyright.PENANAYMbiEyMekQ
22Please respect copyright.PENANA5ix5BupOGh
她一直都是這樣走過來的。22Please respect copyright.PENANAAGcZGoZvki
22Please respect copyright.PENANA4EQ0HNK2Jr
這次也可以。22Please respect copyright.PENANA5lGZmLG67l
22Please respect copyright.PENANAehYKcZwFKa
「莉奈?」22Please respect copyright.PENANAXARj2y6lz2
22Please respect copyright.PENANAdfmTQXvA2Z
星野莉奈把眼睛睜開,看見媽媽穿著家居服,手上拿著溫熱的巧克力牛奶和提拉米蘇切片蛋糕,還有一小盒切好的水果,輕手輕腳地走下樓來。22Please respect copyright.PENANArzMH4kcYMr
22Please respect copyright.PENANA4hf3Jllnl8
「聽到聲音了,才放心。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA89iKvOQFRx
22Please respect copyright.PENANAYoj5sWop2X
她邊說邊靠近,像是怕驚動什麼一樣,動作溫柔又輕。22Please respect copyright.PENANAKveeWAlXy6
22Please respect copyright.PENANAYpZETnytJN
「今天回來時順路看到,就買了一點。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAYoqZNblqms
22Please respect copyright.PENANAQJBtOgkxTk
媽媽輕描淡寫地笑著,把東西放在茶几上。22Please respect copyright.PENANAzjbA06K4wZ
22Please respect copyright.PENANANkhasiIdFz
「我可是藏得很辛苦,才沒被妳爸爸偷拿去吃呢。」22Please respect copyright.PENANApKBtMiDb1p
22Please respect copyright.PENANAfOL5FRrJdh
星野莉奈點點頭,沒說話。22Please respect copyright.PENANAOTot0294mA
22Please respect copyright.PENANA2xPDumN1HE
「趁熱熱的喝,比較好喝。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAEmDXVIqHiZ
22Please respect copyright.PENANAfvXJxUKsCK
星野莉奈視線停在那杯巧克力牛奶上,杯緣冒著微微熱氣。旁邊提拉米蘇蛋糕的高脂肪乳酪,上面還填蓋一層層奶油——22Please respect copyright.PENANALwCf5Ydfnl
22Please respect copyright.PENANAglhOXX4i54
「不急著變得更好,今天先吃飽就好。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAEvKhi2QnTF
22Please respect copyright.PENANAjGVejFRMf8
媽媽笑了笑,拍拍她的手背。22Please respect copyright.PENANAv2U2mpGo8p
22Please respect copyright.PENANAyD2WxAHAup
星野莉奈抬起頭,視線越過媽媽的肩膀,落在牆上的那張照片——22Please respect copyright.PENANAmEsfLQyAmO
此刻照片裡的她,正穿著家居服站在自己面前,笑容跟牆上照片模特兒一模一樣——眼神一樣溫柔堅定,聲音一樣輕。22Please respect copyright.PENANAgnewlDyjTC
22Please respect copyright.PENANArax166JHRK
她鼻尖微微發酸,輕輕點頭。22Please respect copyright.PENANAYOdBiUfSJm
22Please respect copyright.PENANAuKeX4zonA4
星野莉奈一直都知道,自己崇拜的那個人——不是因為她站在鎂光燈下,而是因為每一個像現在這樣的時刻。22Please respect copyright.PENANAI135YUpQHJ
22Please respect copyright.PENANAvjukqRO6dW
媽媽在她對面的單人沙發坐下,輕輕舒了一口氣,像累了很久,終於可以休息一下。22Please respect copyright.PENANA6Ur0T5QQyh
22Please respect copyright.PENANAcipeuGGMET
過了好一會兒,她才開口,語氣又輕又帶著一點笑意:22Please respect copyright.PENANAk6BoFvZlKi
22Please respect copyright.PENANAe5QlJJvVsC
「還在想小冴啊?」22Please respect copyright.PENANAeMbtG92AfX
22Please respect copyright.PENANANPUTKsjPu8
言語裡帶著寵溺,就像提到什麼頑皮又惹人喜歡的小動物。22Please respect copyright.PENANAr8eFs1TKjz
22Please respect copyright.PENANAjzizaYMiBv
星野莉奈怔了一下,眼眶瞬間酸了。低下頭,小小地吸了一口氣,沒回話。22Please respect copyright.PENANAi0teCdXPPu
22Please respect copyright.PENANA4Dt9kUuzIt
媽媽沒有逼問,只是歪著頭,笑得更溫柔了些,是心疼,又笑她太傻、太認真。22Please respect copyright.PENANA6UYhiU6QdN
22Please respect copyright.PENANA7zKQs2ErT8
「那孩子啊,從小就不太會說話,悶悶的;嘴巴硬得要命,心卻軟得不得了。明明什麼都放在心上,偏偏開口的時候,說出來的都是會惹人誤會的話。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAzBHGpv4Zwe
22Please respect copyright.PENANAwo1DCNyvLI
她笑了一下,沒什麼無奈,彷彿在說自家孩子,再麻煩都覺得可愛。22Please respect copyright.PENANAFWrRXcV6jl
22Please respect copyright.PENANA38PkVSQ1Qy
「傻得很可愛。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAjJa9p2RndL
22Please respect copyright.PENANANDT7SMcJZ4
媽媽靠進沙發椅背,像在說一個輕輕的故事。22Please respect copyright.PENANA0WY2q2nTuN
22Please respect copyright.PENANAVlub40WJm2
「偏偏妳就看得出來,他其實一直有在注意身邊的事——只是他不習慣出聲,不習慣被綁住。就像那天我看他來家裡,鞋子擺得整整齊齊的,手上東西也沒忘記拿,話雖然不多,但我說一句,他都聽得進去。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAb0f7QVrOkJ
22Please respect copyright.PENANAmFdiMZEUth
星野莉奈咬著唇,肩膀微微顫了一下。22Please respect copyright.PENANAQPRVOacmLd
22Please respect copyright.PENANARuoAOnSgrW
「冴那孩子不會說喜歡妳,不會說想妳,也不會主動牽手⋯⋯但每次妳跌倒了,都是他站在妳後面,手放在妳背上,等妳自己站起來——從小就是這樣呢。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA6448oCQKWE
22Please respect copyright.PENANAxarbkewtjv
星野莉奈很安靜,雙手卻把曲起的雙膝抱得更緊。22Please respect copyright.PENANASdet5jMcuL
媽媽靜靜看了她一會兒,然後緩緩地站起來,走到她身邊。22Please respect copyright.PENANAAAKVcg85rU
22Please respect copyright.PENANAzN7re2weef
什麼都沒說,只是坐下,輕輕把她摟進懷裡。22Please respect copyright.PENANABu08lobnOn
22Please respect copyright.PENANASAjBfNHyda
沒有太用力,也沒有多餘的語言。22Please respect copyright.PENANA3uGH3vCRTq
只是這麼靜靜地,把她抱住。22Please respect copyright.PENANAu8zjez66nl
22Please respect copyright.PENANAvPTWU1SAtu
一開始星野莉奈還僵著,像是不太習慣。22Please respect copyright.PENANAvKuZhdzMNi
但很快,她慢慢地,把額頭靠進媽媽的肩膀。像終於找到可以喘氣的地方。22Please respect copyright.PENANAGEof1hMty3
22Please respect copyright.PENANAbl4IXaQNZd
媽媽一隻手輕輕拍著她的背,低低地說:22Please respect copyright.PENANAVYYk2qk2iN
22Please respect copyright.PENANAWlHzk9bMLT
「辛苦了,寶貝。真的很辛苦了。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA44H1i881IL
22Please respect copyright.PENANAI1cTRwWW7k
星野莉奈緊緊閉著眼,眼淚無聲地滑下來。22Please respect copyright.PENANABSZCGYgWkK
22Please respect copyright.PENANAm1LLCLhqu4
媽媽輕輕拍著星野莉奈的背,過了一會兒,輕聲笑了:22Please respect copyright.PENANADNphW8XbdA
22Please respect copyright.PENANAHjd3WQ1NH4
「媽媽啊,年輕的時候也有過喔。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA3nQNp8GLkm
22Please respect copyright.PENANAp1Zx76p3jr
星野莉奈動了動,沒有抬頭,但她聽見了。媽媽的手一邊順著她的背,一邊慢慢地說:22Please respect copyright.PENANAr1SWSTOSoV
22Please respect copyright.PENANAOR3hBp4bKj
「那時候,我還是新人模特兒,剛開始走紅。接了很多廣告,也拍了人生第一本寫真集。那本是跟一位很有名的攝影師合作的,風格偏紀實、比較像是在記錄那時候的我,沒有太多妝、也沒有太多設計——只是陽光、素顏,還有一些比較生活感的場景。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAL7Iisk7wyr
22Please respect copyright.PENANAHjP6VseoTu
她頓了一下,像在回想那段時間的味道。22Please respect copyright.PENANA8adOiCTe8w
22Please respect copyright.PENANAKjyIGXNmqo
「但外界的聲音很難聽。什麼天生好命啦、靠人脈啦、會炒作啦⋯⋯說得好像我所有的努力都不是我自己的一樣。那時我也年輕,不太會反駁,只能一直拍、一直撐,讓自己撐到那些聲音沒辦法再把我抹掉。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA9i2pOKjxgc
22Please respect copyright.PENANABH016qmr6E
她笑了笑,語氣帶著一點無奈,又有點溫柔:22Please respect copyright.PENANAWAYtHimdvI
22Please respect copyright.PENANAXNlAGI00KQ
「那時候啊,唯一相信我、支持我的,就是妳爸爸。他還只是個小小的攝影助理,沒什麼話語權——但每次拍照,他都特別認真幫我找角度、打光,什麼都不多說,卻用行動讓我知道,我不是一個人在對抗這個世界。」22Please respect copyright.PENANALBDu4NzINg
22Please respect copyright.PENANAHREKC17oYJ
媽媽低頭親了親星野莉奈的髮頂,聲音低低地,像是把一個秘密輕輕放進她耳朵裡:22Please respect copyright.PENANA2rsaEzGXlr
22Please respect copyright.PENANASIh1SAWd9F
「所以啊,妳現在這樣難過,是很正常的。不是妳做錯了什麼,也不是妳不夠好。是這個世界,有時候就是這麼吵、這麼粗糙。」22Please respect copyright.PENANApvFhFhPhAP
22Please respect copyright.PENANA7MBv5BPGtd
她停頓了一下,又笑了笑,語氣變得更溫柔:22Please respect copyright.PENANApC7SzRXDYP
22Please respect copyright.PENANAJAZRFULAz3
「我一直都知道,妳活得很自主,走路很穩,不太需要別人扶——也一直以為,給妳空間、讓妳自由,就是對妳最好的支持。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAoB5mSQDsAk
22Please respect copyright.PENANAdm9kEK4XOA
媽媽輕輕收緊了擁抱,語氣像嘆息又像自問自答:22Please respect copyright.PENANAo8rxnMJa73
22Please respect copyright.PENANAzBdrgDAhNz
「但是啊⋯⋯就算是最會走路的小孩,有時候也會想被抱一下吧。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAJzcHoncI1O
22Please respect copyright.PENANAz1FGA8P2jx
星野莉奈緊緊咬著唇,肩膀又顫了一下。媽媽輕輕拍拍她的背,接著說:22Please respect copyright.PENANAXypfYCk5yz
22Please respect copyright.PENANAsrotEZdOkZ
「鈴也是啊。那孩子,特別有正義感。她知道妳不想被誤會、不想傷害任何人,所以她什麼都想擋在自己前面——讓妳可以專心做妳自己。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA8P3M8yMHpA
22Please respect copyright.PENANAMFSG5pE3Xi
媽媽的呼吸很輕,輕到不帶任何情緒:22Please respect copyright.PENANAvxDxmYIJYy
22Please respect copyright.PENANARA6wPdCVzu
「而小冴呢⋯⋯很早就決定好怎麼走他的人生了。妳不能拉住他,但妳可以在他停下來的時候,剛好在那裡⋯⋯他不是會說出『我需要妳』的那種人,但那不代表他不需要。」22Please respect copyright.PENANACdevUyyUEH
22Please respect copyright.PENANAcBq6nXm7De
星野莉奈伸手輕輕抓住媽媽的衣角。媽媽溫柔而堅定地說:22Please respect copyright.PENANAQ7twuQmtZ7
22Please respect copyright.PENANAHg9sBlxc4Q
「妳啊,真的做得很好了。」22Please respect copyright.PENANA0wlo9k9Stk
22Please respect copyright.PENANA22XR7j3Xry
媽媽低笑了一下,帶著一點調皮的寵溺:22Please respect copyright.PENANAlh605lJT0N
22Please respect copyright.PENANAEmsCedWd2k
「誰叫咱們家女兒眼光這麼好,偏偏喜歡上那麼獨立、又不太會說話的小傻瓜呢?」22Please respect copyright.PENANAC86tGLWRZ3
22Please respect copyright.PENANA0LUohNWo6k
她閉著眼,眼淚靜靜地,不斷滑下來。22Please respect copyright.PENANAJTdQUwL5p5
沒有聲音,也沒有顫抖。22Please respect copyright.PENANAf17ldtl2r4
22Please respect copyright.PENANAYdQpITeFVy
只有胸口,微微一下一下地疼著。22Please respect copyright.PENANA4GDV0nnrCZ
22Please respect copyright.PENANAI3H2drFH0f
她忽然想起自己曾經無數次,22Please respect copyright.PENANAr9cRpnUlW1
在球場邊,在便利商店,在一個又一個不經意的黃昏裡,22Please respect copyright.PENANAZNjJSyVpRJ
悄悄地等過那個人。22Please respect copyright.PENANANVlyJNJk3R
22Please respect copyright.PENANAC04ctAFXjz
等他的訊息。22Please respect copyright.PENANA84PYczfw8s
等他的目光。22Please respect copyright.PENANAd1ebs50xmJ
等一個不一定會到來的回應。22Please respect copyright.PENANA9LrkGgAhuH
22Please respect copyright.PENANA9Z3Jo8uscG
不是為了要證明什麼,22Please respect copyright.PENANA2SrWkCjQWA
只是因為——22Please respect copyright.PENANAiEIq671zHx
她真的很在意他。22Please respect copyright.PENANAPDMdZ8aRrU
22Please respect copyright.PENANAMTm4j7OD2Z
那時候,她總是告訴自己:22Please respect copyright.PENANAbFbicZRTi7
22Please respect copyright.PENANANiWGjgwJkB
「沒關係的,我可以等。」22Please respect copyright.PENANAL1USePtpja
22Please respect copyright.PENANA7jEUvhlo6F
直到今天,她才第一次承認,22Please respect copyright.PENANAeZuPovkASy
原來那些輕描淡寫的等,22Please respect copyright.PENANANtT9CLF8xb
從來都不是輕的。22Please respect copyright.PENANAeyvAJ5siyc
22Please respect copyright.PENANAd2YwoVOR01
媽媽的手掌還在輕輕地拍著她的背。沒有催促,也沒有要求她快點振作。22Please respect copyright.PENANAeNOcLNtCfg
只是一遍又一遍,溫柔地拍著她的背。22Please respect copyright.PENANAxWYo0LE739
22Please respect copyright.PENANA3mOhGaqF3m
外面的風聲輕輕吹過,屋子裡只剩下心跳的聲音,和媽媽溫暖而堅定的擁抱。
ns216.73.216.70da2