我為咗媾女而特登留級，然後遇到我嘅女神（連載中） - 二十

二十

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我真係好緊張咁望住個mon…明明已經唔係面對面咁對住June表白，但我都覺得自己心跳得好快，塊面好似好紅好熱咁…

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一分鐘過去。

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五分鐘過去。

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十分鐘過去。

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冇回應。

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我一路等，個心一路往下沉。

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冇事既，June可能去咗廁所啫…又或者…可能係去咗沖涼啫…

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但我心知肚明，我係幫自己兜緊。

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啱啱仲咁好傾，突然之間去咗廁所、去咗沖涼？

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見June咁耐冇回應，我又忍唔住send多次message比佢︰"我認真架。我真係鍾意妳，想妳做我既女朋友，我會好好對妳架。"

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Send完出去之後，其實緊張感已經冇啱啱咁重，只係想June快啲回覆我，無論係成功與否，我都叫得個知字。

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就算唔得，都叫解脫咗吖…

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真係咁諗？

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呢個時候，我鍾意留意到June輸入中…

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我個人即時緊張起黎，然後仲要坐直個人，硬晒軚咁望住個對話框。

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求神拜佛…

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June︰"Sorry"

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June︰"maybe I gave you some 錯覺, there is some 誤會"

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June︰"你係好人"

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June︰"We are always friends"

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呢四個messages就好似晴天霹靂咁，打入咗我心口…

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呢張…係傳說之中既好人卡…？

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我呆呆咁坐咗喺電腦面前望住個mon，一時反應唔嚟，連要回覆June都唔記得咗。

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直至到June再send另一個message過黎…

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June︰"Sorry..."

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吖，無論結果係點都好，我係應該回返佢一個message，係咪？

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我︰"唔駛sorry喎，哈哈，冇事、冇事，我都知妳其實係唔鍾意我，OK既！"

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至少我有講到出黎，係咪？

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表白，都有一絲機會，唔表白，連果一線機會都冇埋。

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呢句，係我喺啲forum上面睇返黎既，我好認同。

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…

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所以咪搞到我而家咁囉。

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唉。

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而家回望返，我諗呢句嘢其實係要睇埋當時既情況既，如果你明知係死路一條既，我建議你唔好跟住做。

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不過…

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呢個世界又有幾多個先知呢？

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June又send咗個message過黎︰"你唔好咁喇"

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難得全部都係中文，唔怪得打咗咁耐都係打咗呢五隻字…

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定係…其實佢打算hea我，先打咁少字？

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唉呀，呢個moment我好難停止胡思亂想啊。

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我︰"我哋仲係朋友，係咪？"

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June︰"Yes, we are friends, we are always friends"

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嗯。

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咁就夠喇。

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至少我同June都仲係朋友。

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We are always friends...

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都唔錯吖…

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我冇喊。

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不過，我真係好頹。

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十幾分鐘之前，我同June仲有傾有講，氣氛好好，點解轉過頭就咁尷尬既？

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我望住個mon，完全唔知應該做啲乜嘢好…

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June︰"I need to have dinner, c u"

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我︰"咁啱既，我都要食dinner，我哋再傾？"

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June︰"No problem ^^ "

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啊…

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而家佢off埋line添…

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我係咪真係有飯食？

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梗係唔係喇，爸爸媽咪都未返，我又何來有飯食呢？

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我只係…唔想好似自己單方面被遺棄咁啫…而係同June一齊offline…

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咁June呢？佢係唔想同我傾計？定係真係要食飯？唉，我唔知，我唔敢諗。

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我攤咗喺床上面，不斷咁樣安慰自己︰冇事既，搏盡無悔吖嘛，你都叫做盡咗力，將自己既心意講咗比佢知吖，咁佢唔鍾意你都冇計既。冇嘢喎，咪之後繼續同June做朋友囉，佢都話OK啊，we are always friends嘛。

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唉，我心知肚明，我根本就唔係想同佢做friends…

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我喺床上面典黎典去，但根本冇法得到安寧…咁都好正常既，啱啱先比自己心愛既女神拒絕，心情來安寧？

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係咪如果喊出黎會舒服啲呢？但我喊唔出喎…唉，連喊都喊唔出，我連失戀既資格都冇啊…

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呢個時候，我聽到出面有開門聲…應該係爸爸媽媽同三家姐返咗黎…

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「宇仔！出黎食飯喇！」媽咪把聲喺出面嗌入黎。

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唉，我失戀啊…點解呢個世界仲有人可以好似平時咁過？

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「美恩，妳幫我入去叫宇仔出黎食飯喇！」媽咪見我唔應機，就派三家姐入黎搵我。

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「媽咪妳真係偏心！買埋返黎仲要搵我入去『請』佢出黎食！」三家姐不滿地道。

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「哎呀，妳唔係要呷細佬醋吓嘛！」媽咪把聲又道：「唉，雪櫃入面有碗芝麻糊，我本來諗住自肥，而家請妳食喇，唔好再話媽咪偏心嘞！」

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「好嘢！媽咪萬歲！」三家姐開心地道：「我而家即刻入去叫細佬！」

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「啊，妳個衰女變得咁快，係咪一早就謀住我既芝麻糊！」媽咪扮嬲咁笑住講。

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「嘻嘻！」

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我喺床上面聽住媽咪同三家姐之間既對話，心諗佢哋真係傾得好愉快...我呢...雖然只係一房之隔，但真係彷如隔世...

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唉，我唯一可以安慰到自己既，就係至少我勇敢地向June表白咗自己既心意...至少...我試過吖...搏盡無悔...

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（待續）

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