[我們做的東西才不會爆炸]492Please respect copyright.PENANAOsiGicXo9H
492Please respect copyright.PENANA5K6SATCN5z
地精跟哥布林是一體同源只是稱呼上有差別,不過可以了解的是它們做的東西都會爆炸。492Please respect copyright.PENANAsgxl7y6g0n
492Please respect copyright.PENANAysUN5zA1KC
地精跟侏儒不一樣,不過名稱常搞混,還有侏儒做得東西不會爆炸。492Please respect copyright.PENANA9w3Sd15AIr
492Please respect copyright.PENANAtHAVelg1RQ
這座島上有一堆侏儒跟地精,地精總以為他們跟侏儒是同種人,而對岸的哥布林認為地精跟它們是同族,地精又說侏儒跟它們同族,所以哥布林跟侏儒應該是同族。492Please respect copyright.PENANA6JqZc13Ven
492Please respect copyright.PENANAn18scHTl2C
侏儒心裡很明白我們不是地精也不是哥布林,而且侏儒也知道我們做的東西才不會爆炸。492Please respect copyright.PENANAY20xHKw7F2
492Please respect copyright.PENANAExIiotV2oj
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAEAZG1FewYX
492Please respect copyright.PENANAJzjAe89ZPU
地精做的東西都會爆炸,所以他們認為爆炸是很正常的。492Please respect copyright.PENANA1XxsMAvt2k
492Please respect copyright.PENANAjJbfAoWvbY
侏儒可不這麼認為,會爆炸就代表是瑕疵品,會爆炸就可能有死傷。492Please respect copyright.PENANADu7Z4wEYeP
492Please respect copyright.PENANAnw3qPh1QrR
有一陣子地精跟侏儒在爭吵「半永續魔石能源爐」的設置。492Please respect copyright.PENANAS1W9usTeME
492Please respect copyright.PENANAyAJRJMIKyn
這實在是時代的錯誤,地精那偉大的先代大酋長(已故)妄想開發出可以打倒哥布林酋長的魔法兵器,而這種魔法兵器需要半永續魔法能源爐排出的廢礦。492Please respect copyright.PENANAcWhJVSLAh3
492Please respect copyright.PENANA7S2rWhMYx8
所以地精們一口氣蓋了三座舊型爐,現在還想蓋第四座。要不是後來東方的精靈大人察覺了大酋長的野心,恐怕現在島上已經十幾座了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAsbbaHrd3ZZ
492Please respect copyright.PENANAqQRMkDg1Ta
後來好不容易地精們有機會做第四座,可是這下侏儒們就不爽了,這島就這麼小,只要其中一個能源爐爆炸大概會有一半的地方受到汙染不能住人,你還想蓋第四座?492Please respect copyright.PENANAZ8JRAP9NQx
492Please respect copyright.PENANApiStL1BghZ
這是想留島不留侏儒嗎?492Please respect copyright.PENANAiEK5AmZy0x
492Please respect copyright.PENANACZgn3USUzD
地精當然不這麼想,爆炸很正常,它們反而覺得前三座能源爐不爆炸太不正常了,這一定是侏儒們細心維護的結果。492Please respect copyright.PENANAn4qSEUp1xf
492Please respect copyright.PENANAg9Scf3ACAC
這不符合地精的風格,是的地精把東西蓋完就不管了,基本上的維護都是侏儒來做的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAzeoUqPGrRk
492Please respect copyright.PENANApDQlfXAvoK
誰叫侏儒是個有責任感的種族呢?更不用說,有些侏儒為了這件事還被其他侏儒當成叛徒呢。492Please respect copyright.PENANAMroJ7ENqXI
492Please respect copyright.PENANAu99QtFIC9D
就不想想真要爆炸了是算在誰身上?倒楣的還是侏儒啊。492Please respect copyright.PENANAU9m9BXkBo0
492Please respect copyright.PENANARaojwMhY7P
至於地精?他們大不了爆炸了回去西方跟哥布林們討生活而已,侏儒可是沒地方可去了,但那又跟地精們何干呢?492Please respect copyright.PENANA6nLQRfDjKB
492Please respect copyright.PENANAFZkCgdoFgQ
地精向來就是自私的,只想到自己的事,就跟哥布林一樣。492Please respect copyright.PENANAsMaCVdpnlE
492Please respect copyright.PENANArvoofIJ4bI
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAifstmFhlfO
492Please respect copyright.PENANAL6ltpJA6gF
其實追根究柢,地精做的東西會爆炸跟它們的民族性脫不了關係。492Please respect copyright.PENANAiZyLxNrazP
492Please respect copyright.PENANAIw6vURObem
他們真的很容易搞混東西,可以把攝氏十度跟十公分單位搞混,當然不用期待他們做的東西品質良好。492Please respect copyright.PENANAZkU6FzsCnB
492Please respect copyright.PENANAwC2PzaKyl3
侏儒都知道魔法道具的品質跟製作者的數學觀念好壞有很大的關連性,這個很重要的概念,地精是沒有的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAOwTYu72hAa
492Please respect copyright.PENANATz9iLPQhaS
「只要看起來沒問題就行了,你們怎麼這麼挑?」492Please respect copyright.PENANACCLAOqHMMb
492Please respect copyright.PENANAhPu1T0FBWG
這是地精最喜歡掛在嘴邊的話,當然,哥布林也喜歡。492Please respect copyright.PENANAe2eARawNiO
492Please respect copyright.PENANA8U8XPXS4XL
所以說,只要看起來沒問題的話,地精根本不在意那麼多,當然囉,嗜錢如命的地精只要能夠節省成本,標準要多寬就會有多寬。492Please respect copyright.PENANA9kCndcPOvl
492Please respect copyright.PENANA0ktL559MYK
最有名的莫過於某件假油製造案。492Please respect copyright.PENANA92AmCgF4jS
492Please respect copyright.PENANAyN37WrjZm7
大家都知道食用油跟煉金術合成後得到的廢油產物是不同的,前者能吃,後者不能吃。492Please respect copyright.PENANAl11igyiQi7
492Please respect copyright.PENANA6jNa9VoCIN
有個地精商人不知道哪來的點子,竟然回收煉金術合成後的廢油重新精煉調味,製造出看起來可以吃的食用油。492Please respect copyright.PENANAqIqCPwIgTz
492Please respect copyright.PENANAJv9WgCbbDf
這新聞被好事的妖精們爆料出來後,侏儒紛紛發起了對這位地精商人的抵制運動。492Please respect copyright.PENANA0dJbtCsgAp
492Please respect copyright.PENANAzdFHZSK3Jq
那時候人心惶惶,倒是一堆地精拿那些廢油再製品炸東西,賣給不知情的侏儒跟外地人。492Please respect copyright.PENANAwxo9BDznlX
492Please respect copyright.PENANADkaCFnSML0
不為什麼,就是便宜啊。天然的食用油算是加工品,會消耗大量的橄欖或牲畜。但煉金術廢油一開始就是不用錢了,甚至餘回收廢油,煉金術師還得另外付一筆錢給你。492Please respect copyright.PENANAivOap42MJT
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEatkds79XP
無本生意是人人做,有了一個就會有第二個,等到妖精們把消息都傳出去後,侏儒們才知道這十幾年它們吃的東西到底有多噁心。492Please respect copyright.PENANAt9DLcMGYtC
492Please respect copyright.PENANA7tLUw6gXY2
可是那些地精哪管這些?這錢賺得可爽了,看起來能吃就行了,檢驗也符合標準啊!492Please respect copyright.PENANAsoEQWk4A4M
492Please respect copyright.PENANAPDxjfQaHnY
大多數的地精都是這樣想著:492Please respect copyright.PENANAyavry608BN
492Please respect copyright.PENANA2o0fv6P8I2
侏儒們的身體太弱了,才會拒絕吃這種油,真是沒出息。492Please respect copyright.PENANAkxfcvGKcds
492Please respect copyright.PENANABAT7h4PKSH
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAhTNVK495d2
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEnumQeRLlY
如果你以為地精們都是笨蛋,那你就錯了。所有的地精都有其狡猾的一面,小看它們可是會吃不完兜著走。492Please respect copyright.PENANAf7ZzM2Io5w
492Please respect copyright.PENANAHEGuz8K0nR
事實上,地精的數字觀念並不輸給侏儒。只不過他們在意的數字只跟金錢有關,與金錢無關的數字他們是會選擇性無視的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAVihytbHOdg
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1yY6Xfk4M0
地精對自己子女最常問的問題是:492Please respect copyright.PENANAPEbfWhBqgp
492Please respect copyright.PENANATW3VBZaPST
「你做這個有甚麼用?是能賺到錢嗎?」492Please respect copyright.PENANAwQMmFsULDE
492Please respect copyright.PENANAlleGgvyUFC
這句話就是地精的核心價值,對它們來說有沒有用跟他能不能賺到錢有關。492Please respect copyright.PENANAoH1WtcKuK1
492Please respect copyright.PENANAMPFBiRU47E
所以賠錢貨跟無法賺錢的東西都是沒有用的廢物,是可以捨棄的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAYCTWNPhLoT
492Please respect copyright.PENANAZJRD6bLtQV
並不是說錢不重要,侏儒也很重視錢,沒有金錢很多事都做不到。492Please respect copyright.PENANAuk0asNXckz
492Please respect copyright.PENANAWGvktgrI25
每一個有理智的侏儒都知道,金錢只是一個工具,它不能成為一個價值觀。492Please respect copyright.PENANABokKW3e5p9
492Please respect copyright.PENANA8Lid654EUw
但是對地精來說,金錢就是它們的價值觀。492Please respect copyright.PENANAuTXki0oMa4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAq1HeT0Qf0F
為了金錢,它們可以犧牲一切,包括自己在內。492Please respect copyright.PENANAK58VI1zJBc
492Please respect copyright.PENANALVelg9Jp6N
當然我們不能說這樣的價值觀是錯誤的,但是搭配上地精的差不多先生民族性,這就很要命了。492Please respect copyright.PENANA3tNlogcfHK
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1ENR66Eel7
魔法工業用酒精跟食用酒是差不多的,可是魔法工業用酒精很便宜,我們就拿這個當酒來賣吧!492Please respect copyright.PENANAQg7C7XkdsT
492Please respect copyright.PENANADaGxMpHiDN
魔法工業用明礬跟可食用明礬看起來一樣,可是魔法工業用明礬比較便宜,所以我們就…492Please respect copyright.PENANAljAuZfq6oC
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvB3L8C7MKQ
塑化劑跟起雲劑加到食物裡面造成的效果看起來差不多,可是塑化劑比較便宜,所以我們就…492Please respect copyright.PENANA0lbFxdH2jP
492Please respect copyright.PENANAYlCEyTo2tu
嘿!地精的難兄難弟哥布林們也常幹一樣的事情,看他們之前把魔法變出來的毒牛奶當成真的牛奶賣就…492Please respect copyright.PENANAfGwDP9aymR
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEuVXOSw05O
這些層出不窮的案例不是只有在食物上面,舉凡交通、建築、衣服等都有。492Please respect copyright.PENANA2Ubc1lMRF3
492Please respect copyright.PENANA9QcXldPYrW
搞得侏儒人心惶惶,不管做甚麼都怕遇到劣質商品。492Please respect copyright.PENANAzMjoOQFEuU
492Please respect copyright.PENANA6Ub6szGnyE
可能有人有疑問,那些地精跟哥布林們就不怕嗎?492Please respect copyright.PENANAEls4hYSHpk
492Please respect copyright.PENANAaWefZzG0md
當然不怕,只要看到那些黃澄澄的金幣,他們開心都來不及了,還怕甚麼?492Please respect copyright.PENANAolbUEofiAJ
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1DoEPvuFS3
※492Please respect copyright.PENANArmW840m6Rc
492Please respect copyright.PENANAjQzHUjt2ln
地精可以說是最沒有同理心的種族,它們很少用同理心去跟思考事情。492Please respect copyright.PENANAycWnZCh2E5
492Please respect copyright.PENANAN0DPhOf0v6
如果有一件事對它們自己有利卻對其他人有害,它們就算知道了也會毫不猶豫地去做。492Please respect copyright.PENANApSTPtu6vsC
492Please respect copyright.PENANABwnDgSwqFi
沒有比地精還要自私的種族了,哥布林除外。492Please respect copyright.PENANAQdB04CKU8G
492Please respect copyright.PENANApw3ZyZDfGB
跟地精打交道是很浪費時間的一件事,其一是它們很狡猾,其二是它們無法理解他人的困難。492Please respect copyright.PENANAjj3WzSi42J
492Please respect copyright.PENANAlh2ymnuCjM
這點就連地精工程師自己都覺得很煩,是的,再強調一次,連它們自己都覺得很煩。492Please respect copyright.PENANAY8kegeWZKs
492Please respect copyright.PENANAWGzdxaC7qY
地精商人在要求工程施行時最喜歡說的一句話就是:492Please respect copyright.PENANAI79u3z27C7
492Please respect copyright.PENANAcVBOupA3AJ
「我不管,你們一定要在時限內完成,無法完成是你們自己的問題。」492Please respect copyright.PENANAwLfMHKRoXL
492Please respect copyright.PENANAFp3pnZyVib
同樣的意思放在不同人嘴裡會有不同的表現:492Please respect copyright.PENANAuO8AVPa2c8
492Please respect copyright.PENANAB8TucvS6Mq
「考不好是你努力不夠,是你自己的問題。」492Please respect copyright.PENANATm7e9XsEml
492Please respect copyright.PENANA6mmc5eZnRH
「薪水低是你不夠努力,是你自己的問題。」492Please respect copyright.PENANAvidCCsQZjH
492Please respect copyright.PENANAuCMM25Sx3S
「無法使用魔法是你不夠努力,是你自己的問題。」492Please respect copyright.PENANARwxKOVQOFh
492Please respect copyright.PENANAyvqQyFiAsT
附帶一提,地精的魔法天賦簡直是負的,它們的種族從未誕生過一個魔法師。但他們總會選擇性迴避這個問題,假裝魔法師這個職業並不存在。492Please respect copyright.PENANAEqPWtDh5bd
492Please respect copyright.PENANAj75D6551gD
過去,地精的老大哥哥布林們曾經大肆獵殺國內的魔法師跟巫師。很顯然地對這對難兄難弟來說,解決問題的關鍵永遠都在他人身上,而不是自己身上。492Please respect copyright.PENANAE5QmCWXMnP
492Please respect copyright.PENANAny2KtZfFdY
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAoabt5I9y95
492Please respect copyright.PENANARWNyFSavoU
大多數的地精都有點小聰明,該佔便宜的時候毫不留情。492Please respect copyright.PENANA1nQ0cipOID
492Please respect copyright.PENANA4W0CCxtUTS
但這些地精被騙的機率也大到不可思議。492Please respect copyright.PENANAhcVjhrsyuh
492Please respect copyright.PENANAozw6uIPNXk
那些受騙的地精總是有一堆藉口可以說服自己被騙,比方說:492Please respect copyright.PENANA9wb7DyZ3tt
492Please respect copyright.PENANAKYNDkc7aU7
「我那麼聰明,一定不會被騙。」492Please respect copyright.PENANA6pXHu08KXK
492Please respect copyright.PENANA4lqoIuF00m
「人家跟我是親友,不會那麼過分。」492Please respect copyright.PENANAjAyjlG0yZL
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEYcUiCZQG1
「是我運氣太好,抽到大獎正常。」492Please respect copyright.PENANAXncIuhuxXA
492Please respect copyright.PENANAI25qROl5hv
「不可能那麼倒楣就被我遇上。」492Please respect copyright.PENANAIlan59gPea
492Please respect copyright.PENANABfTOhi004d
很遺憾地,不幸遇上詐欺事件後,財物損失的機率幾乎是百分之百。492Please respect copyright.PENANAP91vnXaZYY
492Please respect copyright.PENANAE7T2ybeQqf
常常就有地精傻傻地在魔法師銀行裡面利用魔法傳送了一些金幣給騙徒後,才在事後發現被騙而捶胸頓足懊悔不已。492Please respect copyright.PENANAEsMyHe7Uhv
492Please respect copyright.PENANAeY90INc6n0
更好笑的是,大多數的地精都是被自己人給騙了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAIekk98KInk
492Please respect copyright.PENANAxyOLBEi2oA
是的,只有地精懂得怎麼騙地精,地精是世界上最狡詐的種族,也是最愚蠢的種族。492Please respect copyright.PENANAIDfgLATUOd
492Please respect copyright.PENANAjQsnnUgE3w
這個世界各種高級詐欺都是在地精手上發揚光大的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAnd5h7fZsLr
492Please respect copyright.PENANADe98HFoXOR
最有名的就是「飛馬彩券詐欺」案件。492Please respect copyright.PENANASyv96rMfAD
492Please respect copyright.PENANAr4WYfZt6FW
飛馬彩券是由飛馬通運公司發行,這間公司的老闆為了吸引客人使用他們的貨運服務,想到了利用彩券的點子。492Please respect copyright.PENANAUK4dSB2ag0
492Please respect copyright.PENANAh8JLyW0b19
只要使用郵件服務就會在收件者的信件裡夾一張飛馬彩券,只要刮開彩券的魔法塗層就會看到一組符文,符文記載的內容就是彩券的獎品。492Please respect copyright.PENANAVVAoPHD55k
492Please respect copyright.PENANAG6ZdJOwv4m
透過這樣的方式,公司的業績也扶搖直上。但不久後就被一些有心的地精偽造各種山寨的彩券,夾雜在飛馬公司負責的郵件裡面。492Please respect copyright.PENANAdJMlmqtYCG
492Please respect copyright.PENANAyA2yIUUqMS
這彩券的中獎率自然是百分之百,金額也高得嚇人。所以收到彩券的地精在刮開彩券的當下通常會興奮地找不著北,然後順著彩券上記載的魔法通訊號碼,拿起魔法傳聲機撥號過來。492Please respect copyright.PENANA99BSY8vg4x
492Please respect copyright.PENANAoEN7EFHUEP
當然這獎品是注定拿不到的,但詐騙集團的地精會巧立各種名目,說為了政府法規或者運費等等,要求對方先匯出一筆不小的金額。492Please respect copyright.PENANAUOQ0ZszEG5
492Please respect copyright.PENANAnS0VTaqtvc
然後就沒有然後了,獎品不可能給人,錢也拿不回來了。只有被騙的地精整天望眼欲穿地等著,直到他發現自己受騙為止。492Please respect copyright.PENANAQ4jrIkd7h4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvx2GYqSV6N
聽說受害者高達萬人,總詐騙金額少說一千萬枚金幣。而遭受池魚之殃的飛馬通運公司在此之後信用破產,營運不擅而倒閉了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAmG31qKpZQm
492Please respect copyright.PENANAOKWKbI1TSy
但是類似類型的彩券詐欺依然沒有消蝕,反而以各種不同形式混入了其他貨運公司的信件中,直到現在依然有腦筋不太好的老地精會被假的彩券獎品誘惑,最後騙光身上所有的退休金老本。492Please respect copyright.PENANAJTANlv18qy
492Please respect copyright.PENANApVcjQCSK0H
而那些詐欺犯地精呢?呵呵,就算真的被警察給抓了,也不過關個幾年就能出獄。如果關幾年就能騙到幾百萬金幣,那還真的沒甚麼地精會怕。 492Please respect copyright.PENANARmKZmPaRLs
492Please respect copyright.PENANAKoSiQPoRi7
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAcHkpgsJX58
492Please respect copyright.PENANAsysh7s7SsQ
說到這裡,就不得不批評一下地精的賭性堅強。492Please respect copyright.PENANABAMsxJ5KfA
492Please respect copyright.PENANA0vlro4F3UT
地精非常愛賭博,他們對賭博的怨念遠大於其他種族。492Please respect copyright.PENANAMVyOf3TypX
492Please respect copyright.PENANAiqHn4crMfZ
對於西方的精靈來說賭博是一種娛樂,但是對地精來說,賭博就是一種賺錢投資。492Please respect copyright.PENANAweYGfbryhn
492Please respect copyright.PENANA2H8L2jpyqW
可能有人會認為投資一樣有風險,跟賭博差不多吧?492Please respect copyright.PENANAx4BpBLBXF2
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEJ7cyjIbvl
是的,看起來的確是差不多沒錯。所以對地精來說,這兩樣東西就是同一樣東西了。492Please respect copyright.PENANA8Knso6asLr
492Please respect copyright.PENANAsczWold2TG
只有侏儒知道賭博跟投資的差別在哪裡,差異最多就是那個時間。492Please respect copyright.PENANAGxyAsylQa4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAF8YMu4DcOd
賭博的勝負都是即時的居多,你下注,然後賭贏了就贏得報酬。投資不是,投資是你將錢才投入某項資產中,然後隨著時間演變,資產升值,你的投資才能得到報酬。492Please respect copyright.PENANAQUV652YMQn
492Please respect copyright.PENANAjYEm437xfB
地精才不想搞懂這些複雜的東西,大多數的地精都很急性子。492Please respect copyright.PENANAjpBaFHw65c
492Please respect copyright.PENANAdgVRsTuhzN
他們沒有耐心知道投資利基在哪,風險多高,又要花多少時間才能回收成本。492Please respect copyright.PENANAkHY16DIsSS
492Please respect copyright.PENANAX8geKTZFim
寧願去賭機率,賭運氣,錢甩出去就要馬上看到獲利。492Please respect copyright.PENANAPgIfVOXhan
492Please respect copyright.PENANAy5QgfhE7j7
地精們早就賭習慣了,為了滿足他們的賭癮,島上的政府還聯合幾家魔法師銀行開創了一種叫做「樂透」的魔法機器。492Please respect copyright.PENANA11FqtIFxD9
492Please respect copyright.PENANAx30DOG3lGt
每隔二四六機器就會吐出一長串的數字,只要有地精用這組數字買樂透券,他就可以贏得所有買樂透券賭金的二分之一。492Please respect copyright.PENANAgmoeOoepF8
492Please respect copyright.PENANA0fyipkp2mJ
欸?你說剩下的二分之一賭金去哪了?當然是進政府跟銀行口袋了啊,不然怎麼會只有二分之一?492Please respect copyright.PENANAbXpy9i0FSz
492Please respect copyright.PENANATieGfG2nyZ
當然,為了照顧社會大眾的觀感,主辦的政府跟銀行都說「我們會拿出彩金的一部份來照顧弱勢族群」,至於拿多少那就不知道了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAssb0nLgcjA
492Please respect copyright.PENANAOBpoae74YL
如果你以為這個「樂透魔法」是獨創的,那你又錯了,幾十年前,就有地精們想出一種叫做「六喝蔡」的魔法機器,運作模式跟簽賭方式幾乎跟「樂透」一模一樣。差別在於一個是政府跟銀行帶頭,一個是私人帶頭。492Please respect copyright.PENANAYPOjlIPaFM
492Please respect copyright.PENANAw9hEXnqNIW
後來因為「六喝蔡」的魔法機器太容易被邪惡的法師入侵操縱,加上私有的簽賭組織收完錢後,常有地精會捲款潛逃,結果玩得人就越來越少了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAiuGJ38n9qx
492Please respect copyright.PENANAgNQxz32sya
除了「六喝蔡」、「樂透」以外,地精們還有「運動彩券」、「傌蔣」、「波青割」等多采多姿的賭博方式。492Please respect copyright.PENANAcG1gvpQBDo
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1bflG0LAYw
要談賭博,還真的沒有哪個種族比地精還要感興趣的。不過奇怪的是,地精們非常不喜歡賭場。492Please respect copyright.PENANAJIUu4UUICe
492Please respect copyright.PENANAIdcbAO0bqL
島上的政府是有提案建設賭場過,可是因為地精們奇怪的道德觀,竟然就被否決了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAWcgs3hKwLN
492Please respect copyright.PENANAmWRuai8zhy
一個如此愛好賭博的種族卻會排斥賭場,這對島上的侏儒們來說始終是一個難解的謎。492Please respect copyright.PENANABIO1oEmYwJ
492Please respect copyright.PENANAVooATa4VyQ
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAHRyYMB8Rpz
492Please respect copyright.PENANAyURRfPHtdt
其實地精還是會做投資的,它們最喜歡的投資叫做「方地鏟」492Please respect copyright.PENANAnAbEGNnYmm
492Please respect copyright.PENANAbfT6Cdavrg
這個「方地鏟」說穿了,就是用一種叫做「地鏟」的魔法道具把一塊土地劃為己有,然後標上一個價值後等人來收購。因為這種魔法道具大多是方形的,所以就被稱為「方地鏟」。492Please respect copyright.PENANAEG679l8mlp
492Please respect copyright.PENANAOTXqfYYbkX
被「方地鏟」的土地除非得到那塊魔法道具,不然是無法在土地上進行任何行為。492Please respect copyright.PENANA9XmNrt9Ahv
492Please respect copyright.PENANAxHQAIhPmPS
身為地精這個種族,既然有個地字,自然是很重視土地的。地精們認為土地是有價值的,所以買賣土地也是一種投資行為。492Please respect copyright.PENANAEoXFDrg7zl
492Please respect copyright.PENANAOtZwIsBGKF
當然,我們不能說這樣做很荒謬,畢竟價值是看人決定的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAqOoKyaEkvD
492Please respect copyright.PENANAnF9orjxVxf
但是地精們把「方地鏟」投資玩到一個簡直可以說是走火入魔的程度,那就讓人感到很無言了。492Please respect copyright.PENANA6ov0I75s7K
492Please respect copyright.PENANAl2pCPqxwVd
這座島的土地畢竟是不多,但好歹也是能讓所有地精跟侏儒可以生活。492Please respect copyright.PENANAlP9STz00iH
492Please respect copyright.PENANA0ococAaQ4J
不可思議的是,這座島大部分的土地都被標上了價格,而且很多都是連地精自己多數人都買不起的價格。492Please respect copyright.PENANATe3ipGatvs
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1XrV34K29r
是的,即使空間足夠,但這座島依然有許多地精與侏儒過著居無定所的苦日子。492Please respect copyright.PENANAHFPh1gz7O9
492Please respect copyright.PENANAqvg6575Kpr
這都是地精們瘋狂地投資「方地鏟」所帶來的禍患。492Please respect copyright.PENANAtDNNN21IH4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAZVKxCxZsSk
地精們發現一件事,只要今天用錢買下一塊「方地鏟」,過沒多久這塊「方地鏟」的價格就會上升,到時候再賣掉就可以獲得一筆不小的利潤。492Please respect copyright.PENANAlGUZKNTgAT
492Please respect copyright.PENANAqF4EdbMrvt
那些地精們都很聰明,它們覺得沒有「方地鏟」的人鐵定是需要買「方地鏟」才有地方住的,所以它們只要有錢就會想盡辦法買「方地鏟」來投資,等待獲利。492Please respect copyright.PENANAMlXm6fd5QN
492Please respect copyright.PENANAk4DLb7RBJy
甚至有更聰明的地精認為既然我賣了就有錢賺,那我為什麼不借錢來買呢?只要把土地賣了馬上就能還錢了,根本不用擔心會賠錢啊。492Please respect copyright.PENANAwKk7yKzfOr
492Please respect copyright.PENANAeAgt3ZUVf5
於是乎越來越多地精投入了「方地鏟」的投資行列中,為了賺更多錢,他們還會用越來越高的價格來買「方地鏟」,這種行為又被稱作「超方地鏟」。492Please respect copyright.PENANAG0yeIT9mWd
492Please respect copyright.PENANAFBE4m1oUfK
地精們做事都是不考慮後果的,很快地島上所有非政府管理的土地都被「方地鏟」了。而「方地鏟」的價格也跟著水漲船高,高到多數人都買不起的程度。492Please respect copyright.PENANATvRYJ9zje5
492Please respect copyright.PENANAM8DKRY3UDB
這些地精們還不知足,連政府管理的土地都想透過非法手段來「方地鏟」呢!492Please respect copyright.PENANAahJq9pJl6x
492Please respect copyright.PENANAcn2wURD4st
甚至為了避免「方地鏟」貶值,它們不惜賄賂多嘴的妖精們,到處散布「方地鏟」是很熱門的好投資,連哥布林跟精靈們都喜歡買個島上的「方地鏟」來保值。492Please respect copyright.PENANAUc7krOpDL9
492Please respect copyright.PENANAInVsEsftFI
事實上,跟地精同族的歌布林也很喜歡投資方地鏟沒錯,哥布林商人跟地精商人一樣都很愛投資低風險的資產,而不會損耗,有認主不會被偷走的「方地鏟」就成了他們最愛的商品。492Please respect copyright.PENANAzCvR10pKQw
492Please respect copyright.PENANAyA1TKvs5cn
但地精們不知道的是,哥布林其實也是拿島上政府的借來的金幣在投資「方地鏟」的。比如說那個號稱島上最高的「異靈異大樓」就是由某位假裝自己是歸島地精的哥布林商人,跟島上政府借錢加上以投資股票的名義跟地精收來的金幣買下。492Please respect copyright.PENANArl8TTZlj6M
492Please respect copyright.PENANAsE8Ub9mCax
如果你覺得到此為止還是正常的投資行為的話請往下看,你會發現地精們為了「超方地鏟」簡直無所不用其極。492Please respect copyright.PENANAEBqHxU7NSd
492Please respect copyright.PENANAswNnLf9vqu
比方說要政府在整個島上蓋滿魔法列車軌道,即使魔法列車軌道本身營運會虧損也要每隔幾公里就設一站。因為只要有車站加持「方地鏟」的價格就會暴漲。492Please respect copyright.PENANABoie67sUrU
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvSjHUl4FBZ
不准政府蓋孤兒院、養老院、精神病院,因為這些會害「方地鏟」的價格暴跌。492Please respect copyright.PENANAS2czfAjCjZ
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvYLbdve7zV
不准政府蓋社會住宅,因為社會住宅可能引來罪犯跟窮人,會害「方地鏟」暴跌。492Please respect copyright.PENANAcJWda9mSKS
492Please respect copyright.PENANAeiRxuxsZOu
拿錢給妖精們,要他們散播「現在進場投資方地鏟馬上就能大賺特賺」的謠言,試圖製造「方地鏟」還很多人想要買的假象。492Please respect copyright.PENANA1SwTf1RKn3
492Please respect copyright.PENANAjqXMMlz889
要求政府開放哥布林拿劣質的偽造金幣來買「方地鏟」,然後無視哥布林賣掉土地後拿到的都是優質金幣這件事。492Please respect copyright.PENANAFgFNe71G60
492Please respect copyright.PENANAa0y3NGEnkW
總之,那些地精們為了自己手上那個可笑的魔法道具,簡直是把整座島弄得天怒人怨。492Please respect copyright.PENANA0WYwdVChuq
492Please respect copyright.PENANABhDdyN90n5
而這個投資的未來展望也越來越糟了,「方地鏟」的價值是決定於需求,而現在的價格已經高到沒有人買得起的程度。492Please respect copyright.PENANALzfm5gfqne
492Please respect copyright.PENANAZZHGSxCWYO
如果哪天「方地鏟」真的崩盤了,想必會有許多地精從「異靈異大樓」跳下也說不定。492Please respect copyright.PENANAr6hey3zQ8p
492Please respect copyright.PENANATlPhP9x9nu
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAXcdJLUmzSZ
492Please respect copyright.PENANAKvi8XAVSd5
從「喜歡立即看到收益」跟「喜歡買毫無意義的方地鏟囤積獲利」兩點來看,我們可以發現地精的矛盾性格。492Please respect copyright.PENANAV3rdt1MR58
492Please respect copyright.PENANAp7Enho0PLj
賺得越快的錢風險越大,但是方地鏟這種東西風險卻極小。兩者理論上是相衝突的,但是很多地精都希望能同時達到兩者。492Please respect copyright.PENANAkMkGoZCP20
492Please respect copyright.PENANA0IVPLC9YAe
我們侏儒用左腳的小腳趾想都知道這不可能,但地精們卻認為這樣才叫在賺錢。492Please respect copyright.PENANACvJ9EUCP7w
492Please respect copyright.PENANAKez3S2JHdy
而且越有錢的地精越是深信如此,這實在是很讓人感到無言。492Please respect copyright.PENANAtFUUA8bf4j
492Please respect copyright.PENANAWJ8M5H36NF
不只如此,地精的矛盾性格在很多方面都存在。492Please respect copyright.PENANAaVzZSzdu2w
492Please respect copyright.PENANAHREluSWpLV
地精們覺得物美價廉的商品才是好商品,卻不知道商品的品質與它的價格本來就該呈正比。492Please respect copyright.PENANAlce0v9LWiE
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEEmpqUC1KH
地精們認為政府不應該做太多管制,卻又在自己不守法而受難遭災時拜託政府給予國賠。492Please respect copyright.PENANA0mcNLbVOwS
492Please respect copyright.PENANA63az2oRovZ
地精們不想花大錢看醫生,卻肯出高價購買魔法地下電台廣告的違法藥物。492Please respect copyright.PENANANti1MuzGmA
492Please respect copyright.PENANAq2vjcrKasl
地精們要求所有人都能對自己誠實,卻又老愛欺騙他人。492Please respect copyright.PENANA8d4werWMt1
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEt6JMgDKdA
有一個現象可以很恰當地描述這種混亂的矛盾:492Please respect copyright.PENANA2cjHec0dLL
492Please respect copyright.PENANAH6acvKfU95
地精們在假日的時候非常喜歡去島上的一些自然景觀遊山玩水。492Please respect copyright.PENANADzNBItaOnb
492Please respect copyright.PENANApTmzcVmn4i
這是好事,不只地精,妖精跟精靈,哥布林跟侏儒也會在假日的時候出去親近自然環境。492Please respect copyright.PENANATB8RAXG1ou
492Please respect copyright.PENANAb0WcQnBzmV
但地精跟哥布林到了所謂的「自然景觀」,常常就會把手上的垃圾丟在當地,或者隨意破壞盜取各種自然造物。492Please respect copyright.PENANANgRLlhTm5b
492Please respect copyright.PENANA6vCNWl6D23
那邊那個,就是在說你,不要拿十字鎬敲女王石的脖子好嗎?492Please respect copyright.PENANAgx6PB2vFnt
492Please respect copyright.PENANA9qgGSqZxWj
還有那邊那兩位,拜託別在神木上刻甚麼「阿明&小美一生一世」的字,這棵樹是你家種的?492Please respect copyright.PENANAJEl699USV2
492Please respect copyright.PENANARCyl8ZfrMv
會喜歡去那種地方,當然是對眼前的景色賞心悅目。但你一邊欣賞一邊把手上的垃圾丟地上造成汙染髒亂,甚至手賤到要把自己正在欣賞的東西給弄壞,這到底是有甚麼毛病?492Please respect copyright.PENANATaLVVFGc2x
492Please respect copyright.PENANA46Vf3S3Mhc
沒有人會喜歡去一個滿是垃圾的地方,連地精都是如此。但也只有地精跟哥布林會一邊欣賞一邊破壞這些景觀,且完全不覺得自己這樣做有甚麼問題。492Please respect copyright.PENANA05by09RDSo
492Please respect copyright.PENANAUx8IF7RusD
真是讓人感到匪夷所思。492Please respect copyright.PENANAVEWcwfwNu4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAUjvm3Cs9C0
※492Please respect copyright.PENANANWCPc3UY5P
492Please respect copyright.PENANAC1TXYZQ8RZ
這種矛盾也體現在地精的國際觀上。492Please respect copyright.PENANAVIdcw8BJab
492Please respect copyright.PENANA7kSNWxvKVB
其實地精身為哥布林的附屬,又接受了各種外來文化的衝擊,對於自身有著很強烈的自卑感。492Please respect copyright.PENANAwSWKvCvNOb
492Please respect copyright.PENANAspd2hhep20
這點侏儒就沒甚麼感覺了,對侏儒來說他們可是能與精靈相提並論的古老種族,或許沒有精靈那種強烈的種族優越感,但是看的東西多了,也沒很在意要跟誰比跟誰比。492Please respect copyright.PENANAirbKzY9ZPj
492Please respect copyright.PENANAOQZJwYXWNv
哥布林對精靈一族一直有很強烈的敵視感,這其實也是一種自卑心理的防衛表象。而地精不只對哥布林,對精靈也有很矛盾的崇拜心態。492Please respect copyright.PENANAaChKDeeyOR
492Please respect copyright.PENANAtsDx7xNzDT
在崇尚精靈帶來的高度魔法文明前,心裡卻也對自己被文化入侵這件事感到憤慨。492Please respect copyright.PENANAWthrin2NYN
492Please respect copyright.PENANAG9I2gWAunv
崇拜哥布林近年崛起的優勢,卻又覺得歌布林文化與精靈相比既粗俗又不堪入目。492Please respect copyright.PENANA1OG8WR1iMF
492Please respect copyright.PENANAbhOh2IqF5A
在大部分的地精眼裡只有哥布林跟精靈兩個種族,頂多再加上北方的蛇人族而已,他們大多無視位在東南大洋的南諸島海族,極北方的機械人文明,認為這世界就是由精靈跟哥布林在推動的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAgpUtrZF8RX
492Please respect copyright.PENANA5q9jYyhWp9
原因無他,太遠了,而且語言隔閡很嚴重。492Please respect copyright.PENANA54VDoloUgM
492Please respect copyright.PENANAHwTIkjNC18
有些地精連精靈內部其實還有分成幾個大部落這件事也不清楚,對他們來說那些高大的長耳族全是精靈沒錯,至於是歐羅巴系統還是雅美麗加系統,他們也分不清楚。492Please respect copyright.PENANAlgB2svw1ut
492Please respect copyright.PENANA5pRz5LCzgx
更不用說相關的地理位置、歷史淵源、習俗文化等,對地精來說他們一向在意的只有錢而已,就是這樣還想談國際觀。492Please respect copyright.PENANAKyasKnpGE1
492Please respect copyright.PENANAYQL7falXzx
那還真是讓人笑掉大牙就是。492Please respect copyright.PENANA0mIzgfNWnJ
492Please respect copyright.PENANA7zRfwBu1aR
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAkO9OGhk1yT
492Please respect copyright.PENANAzYrNMfBcQL
說到這兒,就不得不提一個非常荒謬的現象,叫做「侯斯島之光」。492Please respect copyright.PENANAjQrZoCZB0i
492Please respect copyright.PENANAWJ1wx4CMmn
侯斯島就是這座島的名字,這座島除了地精跟侏儒以外,還住了半身人跟妖精。不過這兩個種族我們之後再談,先來聊聊這個侯斯島之光是怎麼回事。492Please respect copyright.PENANANMhMQ6ESsE
492Please respect copyright.PENANA9kNCESr5e8
地精們剛到侯斯島的時候,這裡就是一個無名小島,全世界能知道這座島的人寥寥可數。492Please respect copyright.PENANAjDsGesJCcB
492Please respect copyright.PENANASdguXTYKFi
前面說過,地精是非常有自卑感的種族,它們亟需要有個證明來宣揚自己的存在。492Please respect copyright.PENANAPiRUBaRo5H
492Please respect copyright.PENANAoBsJ7qCTgh
於是就在種族情結、政治正確、各種天時地利的考量下,「侯斯島之光」這個稱號就誕生了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAnt4nB3GaQg
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1ce2usUd4T
這個稱號的存在就是為了表揚所有在國外取得成就的地精或侏儒,只要你在島上出生,不管是否在島上生活,在日後於國際間拿到莫大成就,就會被地精們冠上這個稱號。492Please respect copyright.PENANAUyYUCwxoHW
492Please respect copyright.PENANACyjwLCTg4L
當然,這個成就必然是要跟錢有關的,如果你的成就看起來不值錢,地精們還不屑給你。492Please respect copyright.PENANAAQzRs7N4FV
492Please respect copyright.PENANAHA91m1oDqe
但如果地精們給你了,你不想要還不行。492Please respect copyright.PENANAfmfrvnP9yZ
492Please respect copyright.PENANAJdz2LmS2l5
當然你要是以為地精們很喜歡侯斯島之光那你就錯了,地精們喜歡的是侯斯島之光帶給它們的優越感,他們並不是在喜歡侯斯島之光。492Please respect copyright.PENANAZ3LhZf23Bm
492Please respect copyright.PENANAS048QvVi4x
好像只要把侯斯島之光掛在嘴邊,自己就能變得跟侯斯島之光一樣偉大了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAYIARYgdWU9
492Please respect copyright.PENANAudX3ollq10
但其實那只是一種錯覺,個人的偉大並無法轉換成族群的偉大,而族群的偉大更不可能轉換成個人的偉大。492Please respect copyright.PENANAKMJfFyo2zz
492Please respect copyright.PENANAWwPrhuAMg0
這個侏儒們都懂,地精們卻不懂,這又得再提到地精的差不多哲學了。492Please respect copyright.PENANASVJR0iWYnr
492Please respect copyright.PENANACzN70ME9a9
你是地精,我也是地精,我們都差不多,所以我就是你。既然你是侯斯島之光,那我也是侯斯島之光,你偉大當然我也偉大。492Please respect copyright.PENANAOF8prdla0k
492Please respect copyright.PENANAufRfsfjUBD
好吧,老實說這跟哥布林最愛用的口號「大家都是哥布林」有異曲同工之妙就是。492Please respect copyright.PENANAlZH6NkpgzK
492Please respect copyright.PENANAh5oKlRBNaF
說真的,很多侯斯島之光也不喜歡地精。尤其是被錯當成地精的侏儒們,通常就是在島上不受其他地精待見才逃到島外發展。現在好不容易成功了,卻又被這些往日瞧不起他們的地精給拿來利用。492Please respect copyright.PENANA8ktIK57rEh
492Please respect copyright.PENANAlBFaUeVqsb
你說,這怎麼能讓人高興得起來呢?492Please respect copyright.PENANACLVXJouYE7
492Please respect copyright.PENANAMSwHVloCCc
※492Please respect copyright.PENANADNODMFt22Y
492Please respect copyright.PENANAmnJCD5AsUq
在退個幾步來說,如果「侯斯島之光」真的能讓這座島揚名國際,其實也是好事一樁。492Please respect copyright.PENANAym9iWEX4Om
492Please respect copyright.PENANAd2HKMCjbrA
很遺憾地,完全沒有這麼一回事。492Please respect copyright.PENANAA23Om2Viap
492Please respect copyright.PENANAurjBfwTRig
大多數外島人並沒有因為知道這些「侯斯島之光」的事蹟,而願意認真去了解這座島上的生態。492Please respect copyright.PENANAEyhQZ80yvV
492Please respect copyright.PENANA7syypGo5aZ
這是理所當然的,就說了個人的偉大不代表族群的偉大了,在精靈們眼裡他們會尊敬一個地精或侏儒絕對不是因為他來自侯斯島。而是因為這個地精或侏儒做的事情值得他們尊敬,所以他們才願意關注對方。492Please respect copyright.PENANAssRhhqdbEL
492Please respect copyright.PENANAycBsqwEc2P
嘛…以一個侏儒冷淡的眼光來看,精靈這整個族群從上到下不管是哪個部落的,都是一副屌個二五八萬天上天下唯我獨尊的打不斷鼻子高傲感。492Please respect copyright.PENANAAd0AFTYipz
492Please respect copyright.PENANAzky70aGTOw
有句俗語叫做:「想打斷精靈的鼻子比殺了他們還難」,意思就是想要傷害精靈的自尊心是很困難的。492Please respect copyright.PENANA4wNWUhmNTj
492Please respect copyright.PENANAEKwSJIPt9q
這種自我感覺良好出現在少部分慣用右手的精靈身上是很明顯的,也因為這樣,沒自信的地精在精靈面前總是抬不起頭。492Please respect copyright.PENANAJYYybd7ShV
492Please respect copyright.PENANAFmGNG14b4H
尤其在島上精靈是很稀有的存在,物以稀為貴的結果,精靈就變得很尊貴了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAy9RzfbSoF6
492Please respect copyright.PENANAK8I4SAp1hE
其實精靈的文化對亞細亞大陸的影響很強勢,以歌布林為中心擴張的各類亞種更是難以抵擋。這幾年也是有侏儒或者腦袋進化錯方向的地精提出「回歸本土」的主張,希望藉由提倡島上的歷史與文化,來消除精靈文化對島上的影響。492Please respect copyright.PENANA73taiVHcKY
492Please respect copyright.PENANAw5R64V17yB
說是這麼說,但那裏還擺著一個「哥布林文化」呢!要「回歸本土」,在某些地精耳中聽起來就像是要「去哥布林化」,這一聽可不能隨便答應了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAZwpumMvfUb
492Please respect copyright.PENANAUKfabAUljM
地精的確很不在意他人感受,短視又近利。但它們自認有一個優點,就是不忘本。大多數地精都是從哥布林帝國移植過來的,對它們來說哥布林帝國才是它們的祖國,你現在要「回歸本土」「去哥布林化」,這不是要它們的老命嗎?492Please respect copyright.PENANANRnyhpmkS1
492Please respect copyright.PENANAQxNxrxppVI
所以這個主張很快就被打壓下來了,沒辦法,地精們只好繼續過著被精靈文化侵蝕的苦日子。想要回歸本土,從島上的歷史開始認真探索,估計沒個半世紀等不到了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAH1zIj0ZsgQ
492Please respect copyright.PENANANComHz5Bfa
你總得等老地精們都死光了才推得動不是?492Please respect copyright.PENANAf7WqVAnzIb
492Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9h2HbUH38
※492Please respect copyright.PENANATOdhWy8bjn
492Please respect copyright.PENANAitimg0GjJ8
說得等它們死光可不是玩笑話,地精們的階級觀念是非常死板且不容更動的。492Please respect copyright.PENANAWAioHjIU6K
492Please respect copyright.PENANAxbHznfwRcZ
越老的地精地位越崇高,不管你有理不有理,只要你夠老,大家就得讓你三分。492Please respect copyright.PENANAD3KBay8S1E
492Please respect copyright.PENANAmOUXHie7rO
這種觀念是普遍存在於地精之中,當然這幾年島上因為不知名因素,各種族的生育率都降很快,所以年輕一代的有這觀念的地精也就稍微少了一點。492Please respect copyright.PENANAzeqlUCO1uF
492Please respect copyright.PENANA6aGcLwAz4k
但至少在中壯年這世代的地精,還是很吃這套的。492Please respect copyright.PENANATt5Mgs9kVR
492Please respect copyright.PENANAPlHrT7FxS3
長輩壓晚輩,學長壓學弟,前輩壓後輩,老師壓學生。很多聽起來有問題的爭執,只要把這個階級關係套上去,你就會發現對他們來說這非常合理。492Please respect copyright.PENANASAoXqNVKHx
492Please respect copyright.PENANAgkddVTDXke
因為我老,所以這件事我對。老子吃過的岩蟲比你吃過的江稞還多,你哪來的膽子跟老子爭這個?492Please respect copyright.PENANAzswUv72Edy
492Please respect copyright.PENANABJ0hL4dlZU
侏儒們都很詬病這種上下關係,在它們眼裡當你年紀大了身體機能大不如前,連腦中的智慧都比不上年輕人的時候,你憑甚麼能得到他人的尊敬?492Please respect copyright.PENANA94QnSLVHk2
492Please respect copyright.PENANAGfcnGqiriO
就憑你活得比較久?那這樣下去誰還願意努力奮鬥?要知道年輕時越拼命的人通常越短命,這樣篩選下去,老了還能當榜樣的可是少之又少了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAKPEc6OWNUl
492Please respect copyright.PENANAPUQy4Doxgo
地精們可不這麼看,它們的上下觀念是承自於哥布林帝國的「努學」,這據說是一門非常深奧的學問,象徵著哥布林帝國五千年博大精深的思想結晶。492Please respect copyright.PENANAXqNh5UqZS4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAK4Mw3CZOlv
(實際上哥布林帝國建國至今也未滿百年,到底是哪來的五千年侏儒們也很納悶。)492Please respect copyright.PENANANh2QZPZr1A
492Please respect copyright.PENANAnrm37Ej8qw
所以對地精來說,這可是真理,一個不尊敬老人的人,除了精靈以外基本上都會被地精瞧不起。492Please respect copyright.PENANAagVBehXL7F
492Please respect copyright.PENANA0dmiaYr1o9
其實對某些看清楚形式的地精來說,這都是為了老後的保障。地精老後的身體機能其實衰敗的很快,如果沒有這樣的機制保護他們,恐怕老了後就會被年輕的地精給拋棄,從此曝屍荒野了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAPLowthSZDd
492Please respect copyright.PENANApZcX5kgwnH
別懷疑,地精是很勢利的種族,像這種死後還要浪費幾百枚金幣,而且一半以上還要被那些教會的混蛋給賺走,有些地精還真的雙手一攤就不想管了。492Please respect copyright.PENANASrVhNNYxWf
492Please respect copyright.PENANAIStdJhBS2J
但好在地精們一直堅持著「努學」,還有另一門學問「嘯道」,才能讓這些年輕的地精傻傻地相信自己就該尊敬沒有能力的長輩們。492Please respect copyright.PENANAXtCWnR2arx
492Please respect copyright.PENANAJS7FpoXlAS
當然等年輕地精長大以後,他們自然會明白自己已經成為既得利益者的候選人,當然更不可能會放棄這兩門學問了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAe9TELCQy5W
492Please respect copyright.PENANA04jPuCgJA5
這就是地精們維護自己的社會結構穩定,減少動亂的好方法。492Please respect copyright.PENANAimZYTQ1b5c
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvY7wQVJ2W3
※492Please respect copyright.PENANAVfawORBThr
492Please respect copyright.PENANA5LEtteCe9B
從地精們重老輕少的價值觀,大致可以猜到地精的教育是怎麼一回事。492Please respect copyright.PENANArJkAqCKq9g
492Please respect copyright.PENANA2BynbNp9sU
簡單來說,地精並沒有把自己的子女當成一個獨立的個體來看。在地精眼哩,年紀越小的人越是廢物,這跟年輕地精的實力無關,只跟它們的年齡有關。492Please respect copyright.PENANAGq6OdIqcIz
492Please respect copyright.PENANA9YzRDDwPfC
所以年幼的地精是沒有任何發言權可言的,有一句地精俗語很直觀地描述了這樣的情況:492Please respect copyright.PENANAV0paWAwOoi
492Please respect copyright.PENANAGbVwkzGxza
「小地精有耳無嘴。」492Please respect copyright.PENANAIjMcS24WhA
492Please respect copyright.PENANAJqAHKHn9Q0
當然這意思不是指年幼的地精真的沒有嘴巴,只是在比喻年紀小的人要多聽少說話,不要隨便頂撞父母。492Please respect copyright.PENANAVvFERDE2gK
492Please respect copyright.PENANAcgw3mFBbsi
諷刺的是,年齡差距更大的精靈教育方式卻完全相反,他們把所有的年幼精靈都當成獨立的個體教育,希望他們能夠盡快脫離父母的照顧。492Please respect copyright.PENANAYGmCKQiAap
492Please respect copyright.PENANATrnZghwQW3
即使在與子女溝通時也會用對等的地位與對方交流,而非只靠權威與蠻力來壓制對方。492Please respect copyright.PENANAdkqYVfZwu2
492Please respect copyright.PENANAXPQbKLNJgy
(至於因為精靈比較年長所以得到地精過多尊敬這種事就完全是題外話了)492Please respect copyright.PENANAWLuw92kysi
492Please respect copyright.PENANAe4Y39Ly8w6
地精教育小孩的方式,最簡單也最多地精會的,就是打。492Please respect copyright.PENANAFRWNs1UAI7
492Please respect copyright.PENANAuIHdLn3nyV
沒錯,就連地精中小學的老師們都很喜歡這一套,對它們來說小孩是無法溝通的,這些小孩太笨了,除了用野獸的教育方式,沒有任何方法可以教導。492Please respect copyright.PENANAzVP880poyY
492Please respect copyright.PENANAQcWx5nhX14
過去就有許多地精父母不小心打死小孩的案件,因為太聰明而生育率不高的侏儒們看到這些地精小孩被自己的白痴父母給打死時,很多都感到心痛不捨。492Please respect copyright.PENANAl5NZ6uzXPB
492Please respect copyright.PENANAffpOMMQUb3
身為地精的小孩是非常不幸的,基本上毫無自由可言。地精父母會以小孩太弱小了不該出門當藉口,嚴格限制年幼地精的外出。492Please respect copyright.PENANAd6jUcjO67g
492Please respect copyright.PENANAZOFfAv0WxN
甚至因為覺得自己空出時間心力來照顧子女是非常虧欠自己的事情,而認為小孩都是欠自己的,自己要小孩做甚麼小孩就該做甚麼。492Please respect copyright.PENANAKUBIopo62z
492Please respect copyright.PENANA3hKvkzgmoO
在經濟方面,地精父母很少會教導自家小孩怎麼花錢,通常不是定時給幾枚金幣當零用錢就是完全不給。492Please respect copyright.PENANAgkOePwXetc
492Please respect copyright.PENANAQXuqD7FJjW
這幾年經濟大發展,有錢的地精父母甚至會每個月給自己小孩幾百枚甚至幾千枚金幣當零用錢,一枚金幣足以讓一個普通的地精審吃儉用過上十天,一個月給幾百枚,只會養成小孩奢侈的消費習慣。492Please respect copyright.PENANAanSuoYyIgS
492Please respect copyright.PENANAilyjSgsg0t
又,因為疏於與孩子溝通。是的,地精眼中最重要的還是錢,小孩只是一個附屬品,證明自己人生過得很幸福的獎狀。492Please respect copyright.PENANAqhpKhRJuv4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAVWIyvXFFby
實際上多數地精並不懂得如何疼愛自己的小孩,它們從未把自家小孩當作跟自己同樣地個體來交流。492Please respect copyright.PENANAMK4VVa90Kg
492Please respect copyright.PENANAhAkmxDhUwN
在這種情況下,教導出來的年幼地精進入青春期大多會變得叛逆不然就變得麻木不仁。前者是將反抗父母當作證明自己是獨立自主個體的行為,後者則是已經完全被剝奪了情感表達。492Please respect copyright.PENANADH5dsPGOQw
492Please respect copyright.PENANAPwExy5V0Nn
不過有趣的是,等到這些小地精長大後.他們又大多無法脫離自家父母的影子。492Please respect copyright.PENANAx7hFjtzlPy
492Please respect copyright.PENANAoamZbHvtQr
只能說基因遺傳是強大的,即使他們再討厭自己的父母,長大後依然無法避免自己變得跟父母一樣,把自己的小孩當作東西來養。492Please respect copyright.PENANA96AbtgHPD6
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvDBUQXGs71
真是有夠悲慘的無限循環啊。492Please respect copyright.PENANAcJTk0UWa8E
492Please respect copyright.PENANAZh7W2rTI8Z
※492Please respect copyright.PENANACsiWJcTPEI
492Please respect copyright.PENANA1wJGtWzNQN
其實在過去醫療不發達,島上各地貧困到難以生存的年代,地精的價值觀真的解決了很多世代衝突帶來的不穩定。492Please respect copyright.PENANAosCv1bXutR
492Please respect copyright.PENANAluaMf642Pt
日子越難過,其實最有活力的年輕族群影響力是越強的。如果不推廣「努學」、「嘯道」,老地精的非自然死亡率非常高。492Please respect copyright.PENANAkGzrg3QJyI
492Please respect copyright.PENANA5TOXQD6aJI
尤其是戰後地精入島,很多老地精顛沛流離餐風露宿孤苦無依,沒有年輕地精的照顧大概只能客死異鄉。492Please respect copyright.PENANAVIsA1zR9l0
492Please respect copyright.PENANAA5d8JMabGt
不過這樣的景況沒有持續多久,在戰後島上的政府接受精靈部落的資助漸漸發展起來,地精們的生活條件也越來越好。492Please respect copyright.PENANAZG9cTb7gh4
492Please respect copyright.PENANAp7vzGDd9Jg
戰後嬰兒潮帶來的人口紅利以及開發中帶來的經濟成長,讓這個戰後世代的地精們得到相當強大的經濟實力。492Please respect copyright.PENANAsQfqnAWdrc
492Please respect copyright.PENANAWrwQlVeRY4
這樣的實力是無法忽視的,再加上「努學」跟「嘯道」的加成,這個世代的地精非常強勢。492Please respect copyright.PENANA84eRFU2YB8
492Please respect copyright.PENANARn4QULydQx
他們認為島上的繁榮是自己靠實力帶來的,沒有自己的努力,這座島上的地精現在還在吃草呢!有這樣的認知,這些地精都非常高傲,而且固執。492Please respect copyright.PENANA7Nj6FjVyF9
492Please respect copyright.PENANAArYtkkxhO4
有的地精甚至認為自己已經能與精靈相提並論,沒辦法呢,接觸的精靈多了就會覺得地精跟精靈也差不到哪,那它們當然會覺得自己也能當精靈囉。492Please respect copyright.PENANARvC98vwSlm
492Please respect copyright.PENANAeKVTuMuVcj
近幾年人口紅利衰退,島上的經濟奇蹟不在。但這些戰後世代的地精依然把持住島上諸多資源,享受著優渥的生活。492Please respect copyright.PENANAyaOep2XpM8
492Please respect copyright.PENANAHyAAchG4tp
它們對往日榮光不在感到心痛,左批這世代的年經地精沒出息,右批這世代的年精地精太會花錢。492Please respect copyright.PENANAOwPObdIwSw
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvcwesXWyVW
總之,它們認為現在的衰退是年輕地精不爭氣帶來的。而身為老前輩的它們,該拖著年老弱智的身體帶領地精繼續走下去,才不會辜負了他們帶給地精一族的榮耀。492Please respect copyright.PENANAnpcwqhNG0h
492Please respect copyright.PENANAC4ruovlZw2
而那些年輕的地精,自小就被這些強勢的戰後世代地精當成物品看待與教育,其實是很難生起反抗心的。不得不說這就是教育的獲勝,地精的教育真的不能等。492Please respect copyright.PENANASWevlyWIiE
492Please respect copyright.PENANAvttpOgckB5
只有極少數的侏儒不吃這一套,他們早就明白整個經濟的衰退是怎麼一回事。當人口紅利不在,國家發展物價上升,自然競爭力就不在,這有甚麼好推給年輕人的?492Please respect copyright.PENANAPP8xLS0CYX
492Please respect copyright.PENANAwvhnVplqLc
更何況很多戰後世代地精都明白這點,不然何必要把自己的地精工廠轉移到東南亞細亞跟南方諸島?甚至那些人還拼命要求政府開放大量外籍的勞動力,希望減輕自家的負擔呢。492Please respect copyright.PENANAeJlw9tOTP8
492Please respect copyright.PENANAA6ZiZ4nwYd
即使是如此,這些老地精們依然會在年輕人面前這麼說:492Please respect copyright.PENANASY8692Tasw
492Please respect copyright.PENANApRmo2NYf6O
「你們都是草莓地精!既軟又嫩!講沒幾句就臉紅不然就要爆炸!哪像我們以前巴拉不拉布阿巴啦…」492Please respect copyright.PENANAMS2tlmkSkm
492Please respect copyright.PENANArVkZvsl6pV
說完後滿足了自己的虛榮感,這些戰後世代的老地精們轉身就去過著比年輕地精更舒適、更糜爛、更沒有出息且完全沒有自覺的生活了。492Please respect copyright.PENANAXi2TZvV9i7
492Please respect copyright.PENANA6IjD4qokJd
沒辦法,誰叫它們運氣好,出生在這個輝煌的年代呢?這樣的生活才是他們應得的啊!492Please respect copyright.PENANAVSNtvSs5Fw
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短篇故事集
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ISSUE #5
我們做的東西才不會爆炸!
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