每次想及那傢伙，他心裡難免生恨。可是恨不了多久，恨意自然而然會被無奈與無力取代，彷彿不曾生起。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGdXQL7LgO
輕嘆一聲。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdUG3qb8ou7
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkr6Zt7RKuZ
媽媽的身影忽地浮現腦海。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sSzgvzkK0
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8a3WQhhxzP
她是個不起眼的女人，普通得他早已忘記那張臉。只記得她怕熱，喜在夏日穿寬鬆短褲散熱，露出一雙細長白腿。他常趁著媽媽在露台忙於晾衫時，從後環抱她的大腿，把滾燙前額緊貼被清風吹得微微發涼的幼滑皮膚上。嘻，消暑妙法。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4eucIXzH4
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO798d21EU6
以為這做法可以持續至小學畢業，或是直到他世故成熟得無法繼續假裝天真。誰料媽媽突然拋下一句「感情變淡」，離家出走。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiJfElorjPc
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifVTp4wGDU
他反覆思考何謂「感情變淡」。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe4lYMcoPIP
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSXjKXnMne
茫無頭緒，直至那傢伙有意無意向他指出重點：變。「感情」，對媽媽毫不重要，否則她不會狠心如此；「淡」是相對而非絕對，若無經歷過對立的「濃」，「淡」其實不是問題；由濃轉淡的過程稱為「變」，也就是問題癥結所在。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBjLDdGZgs
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGVtrEvtKm
為何會變？如何變？可否不變？427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWInF5ON19
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtNzG1Ht0q
他百思不得其解。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFdUFofrlQ
再聲輕嘆。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQciiXkBO6s
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡczXBPy8paS
阿杰的身影忽地浮現腦海。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRakhcFvXrz
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2ba1LvUVp
舊同學聚會裡，他和阿杰並肩而坐。昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，努力尋找共同話題。阿杰唇邊盡是紅酒遊艇名錶，他只記顧商場即將在週末舉行的購物優惠日——妻子叮囑他務必買下保濕精華和優惠裝尿片。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGK4tzM3U3
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1ToBQ3agF
真懷念往時。他與阿杰一起為那些不值一哂的天大課題感到煩惱：學業、夢想、籃球、愛情、人生規劃……後來那傢伙教曉他——一切變幻莫測，根本不由自主。無力與無奈令他深深體會自身的無能。他妒忌，妒忌阿杰仍在那個未醒的夢裡。阿杰察覺到他的妒意，露出一個輕蔑笑容。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzYgJOIL0IT
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEE28rfo6Nh
昔日無所不談的摯友相顧假笑，不再努力尋找共同話題。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDoXzU6jjU
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6ss4KUYgb
緣起緣滅，不由自主。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaIfUgaYPR2
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgVEoY898D
既要緣滅，何必緣起？427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHE84nqsqk3
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1h7wmqbAxd
他百思不得其解。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0pW0JDyUVU
輕嘆有三。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRmmeiCxKt
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0WeCU0ddd
自己的身影忽地浮現腦海。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7T1J3J9cRF
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNkHZluM0f
身影有前無後。難怪，少有留意自己的背。妻子笑說他背部有七痣，像北斗，可導航。他苦笑，笑自己人生無方向。因為自己看不見北斗？只好抬頭望天。天無星，難打卦。無卦，有掛，掛心的掛。掛甚麼？不知道，總覺得人生缺失了甚麼。甚麼甚麼？不知道，難以言明。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsRB99sQhiP
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYZ2Brva4ww
鬱悶。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OKsevYulg
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlBDDsNDg57
懷念媽媽的腿，想要抱抱。懷念阿杰手中的籃球，想要奪走。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLcBb4lE2b
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn4b3wuBh3G
去抱！去奪！427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5t0MLN6Hma
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDWs9aqcKR
抱甚麼？腿已不在。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtmvMtQKOs
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtUrxCstgqM
奪甚麼？球已不在。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmPYA0AdyaG
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkEiW6jv7s
為何不在？為何統統不在？427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU95ShiHmsO
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl1KN6MYL8T
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8iGthtH47
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxkR3gMmrzw
停下來！427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxWF6nVV8k
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7beDYa5lT
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8A7gQXGjFx
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0hCcyX6wyE
慢下來！427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7oAf2UmCq
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXXmsYvvi4
那傢伙沒有回答，繼續前行。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd53TixNS2K
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRj4TtXi5Wm
他只得拼命追趕。走馬看不見花，花開花落馬不知。馬累馬停，他累他停。回頭一望，是天不是地。何時開始背朝天？不肯定，許是拼命追趕期間、忘記自身當刻。竭力抬頭，盡力挺身。不果，只得餘生躬背望地，無法望背望星。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMmiFrjjjj
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhKlneoe6M
孫兒笑問他為何腰背變躬，他答背上擔子過重。孫兒受驚拒絕背負擔子，他說無法選擇，人人不由自主。孫兒再問何解不由自主，他道是變幻莫測之故。孫兒三問為何會變、如何變、可否不變？他答不出話來，淚目凝視孫兒。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsgB8W1Y97E
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxhMLp4IXZk
昔日的他，今日的孫。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXtxMIRoor
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFZa1IC6yDb
永劫，輪迴。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQK8eupevP
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEfmhGTOwN
不敢思，不求解。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8H6EAvKbR
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkV3dmpvkkh
嘆，嘆，嘆。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpwq9qtOmS
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNrMcBHO7j
孫兒問他是否有煩惱，願為他出謀解決。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKyWc0KEEd
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfJwILEaGH
他搖頭。427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3RhUvIiuJI
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZWhMa3Qwf
深知世人永遠無法解決那傢伙。
註：此篇會收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》第八十一章427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvlUdZW3uh
427Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtw8iJ7Psfu
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