我經常做光怪陸離的夢。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ssqFVSsXX
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpRaQXz0KFP
例如上一秒我可能在一大片人群以及鎂光燈下演講和嗚咽、下一秒在地鐵站中被絕種多年的肉食恐龍襲擊然後狂奔。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVY9m7nhiP
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQ6KBaOlSi
或者本來身處羅浮宮裡遇見Taylor Swift和她的新男友兼且歌詞藍本，一眨眼後就遠在東京的Jazz酒吧和村上春樹對賭大話骰。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡABB0oD7D79
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAkY8E5oGvA
當然大學二年級的我還是會做很青春期分泌主導的夢，比如與前女友或者性感的女同學在布吉的別墅瘋狂做愛。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLrQjoY8ast
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG2o5zHw5GJ
現實中莫講是別墅並不存在，布吉在疫症蔓延時根本遙不可及。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DVg5O0VaC
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeC6qKZKg0e
這些夢雖然有趣，但可能因為太不真實，要區分夢境和現實並沒有太難。倒是昨天晚上，我造了一個匪夷所思但真實感極強的夢。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9T1mZVbxp
在夢中我遇見了一隻黑色的貓，牠比176的我還要高一點，拿著木造的權仗，戴黃金的頸圈，像人一樣站着。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjjdBWXVwH
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3eXbUz4a9
強要比喻的話，我會說牠跟古埃及文明的貓神長得有幾分像。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzi87scSfP
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjy5XQeHuJ
「人類，你有想要實現的願望嗎？」貓神用低沉的聲線說，牠大概是一個男性。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkI9DBetBH0
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0bUeuXv2N
「我啊？」我望望四周，不見有其他人類，指着自己問。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTonMgBBDzu
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSG2TgcRFLN
「對。」貓神用更低沉的聲線說。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqj5LASVJ7b
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd2NGVTt3pi
「啊…咁益我？」我有點迷惘以及搞不清狀況。平常這個時候我大概會意識到自己在發夢，但這次我居然有點覺得這個貓神是實實在在的出現在我面前。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tLOSlqfDP
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQl8y5stDyK
對了！446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvgSNQj5Ox
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgsG9hdk2IQ
大概是因為氣味。正常的夢都是沒有氣味的，但這個夢有一股強烈的味道…到底是甚麼味道？有點像小時候去西九龍中心明將壽司內會聞到的味道，腥臭卻異常吸引。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMpLTalMM5J
「怎麼了，阿日，沒有想實現的願望嗎？」貓神問，聲音變得更更低沉了。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6izr5sRZp8
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKOJcpsYyg
阿日是我的名字。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj90Tsml6NG
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0gWgCIPjH
「願望唔係無…但你係咪一定要用書面語講野？」我抓抓頭問，再一次懷疑到底這是夢境還是現實。如果是現實的話，整個設定未免太中二病了吧？還有為什麼牠會知道我的名字？446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9wcoqx4fJe
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrdgAMi7kd
「所以我用口語說話就是你的最大願望嗎？」貓神用百萬富翁裡陳啓泰「最後答案？」似的語氣反問我。我並沒有看過陳啓泰的百萬富翁，但「我讀drama㗎」陳芷青經典之作卻在成長過程看過上千次。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJuKyFOPWf1
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcCtgsp6pXM
「不是！不是！」我連忙答。怎麼我也變成了用書面語說話的怪人？446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSmz3t6UXD
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDXPFvlfdn
「我既願望…嗯…」世界和平實在太虛偽，變成全世界最有錢這種事實在太沒挑戰性。心想事成這種願望太空泛。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwzRXx8VJ0I
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7V5hmvifnJ
神貓降生在我面前，我得想一個對世界有意義的願望，不然就實在是太窩囊了。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUoafSPxYta
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0n4nbC63w6
快要到聖誕節…這個節日實在太可惡。好！我決定好了！446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ949VwUZjXp
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrxEPWnPRj3
「我聖誕節想同女神一齊過！一齊返屋企！」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90F4rhWEU1
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOousnNSc5E
「很好，我可以幫你實現願望。請問你的女神是誰？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkHhJ2hc4tG
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXOUcvH7qSE
「住我屋企隔離既敏青。」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOityPfCBJ
敏青是我高中的暗戀對象。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAaFZQ408pT
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXf85cGnIFK
女神成績很好，公開試前一直替我補習，可惜還沒有告訴她我的心意，我們便進入了不同的大學。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSzxYTDp2C
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzcX0hT3i6
當然我沒有辜負她的努力幫忙，我和敏青分別進了兩大，她是中文大學的學生，我則進了香港大學持續進修學院。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLh2MF84Tjv
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7SxsKQgXW
因為是鄰居的關係，事實上我自小便認識她。我們住在元朗的小區，中學就在可步行的距離。高中前的敏青外表還是一個很普通的女生，但中四拔掉眼鏡，留黑長髮的她，加上溫柔樂天的性格，開始成為學校男生瘋狂追捧的對象。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlgUegyBFTo
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwWmdRRcMuE
我也在差不多的時候為她著迷，甚至有點後悔沒有及早追求她。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HaOFmy3my
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOCjcN96mJ
以我所知，中學時期因為學業和家規，她基本上都拒絕了這些狂蜂浪蝶的追求，亦乖乖的在十時前回家，十二時前睡覺。但進了大學後，喜歡她的人就更多了，聽說有追求者成功了，女神也已經變成別人的女朋友。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkBrSez4Zdc
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIEpx12Leo
「很好，你的願望就是『聖誕節與敏青一起過，然後一同回家。』，對吧？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡerZNlbkods
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVrGqzdUt7N
貓神刻意低沉的聲音有點像老虎低吟，把我拉回現實（或者夢境）。我想起自己小時候還沒有長喉核時，為了不讓別人覺得我是女生，花了很多時間學習聲線壓低的方法。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDf2LuZFu9
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyt4kuzLat7
「等等！」我叫。「如果只係聖誕咁未得一日？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiyvVCFF1xJ
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1grOMZ99nR
「是的。」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIMcl9wL5sR
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDCXCASy2Ds
「咁除夕倒數呢咁？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4HiBQ6ttJ
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cXA14Gh8w
「你的願望不能確保。」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpvXbjue4Br
「咁唔得，咁我改一下…我想願望係『聖誕與敏青一同回家，然後每日與敏青一起過。』」我說。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWf1CLRznRH
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoaLj3aBqq0
「很好，讓我改一下咒語。『聖誕與…』」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5T1QnNpzTc
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnx0hyu0rI3
「等等等，如果我個願望咁樣咪即係好似迫女神鍾意我同埋同我一齊咁樣？我唔想強迫佢嘅意願…」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4exxoMYe1o
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vuQb2B5QD
「的確是強迫啊。」貓神說，這次沒有那麼低沉。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtb5az8ip76
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGJlth6s4X1
「咁我改一下我個願望。我個願望係想女神都鍾意我，咁樣咪唔係強迫囉！」我沾沾自喜。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUSRWSDZ4BX
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9COuZOpvw
「好。最後答案？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Vw9O2ZXaB
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2VZX5CIBJ
「無錯…」我有點猶豫。「啊！等陣！」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYuus18i6rF
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxqyhM7mjm
「又點呀！！！」貓神暴怒地呼叫，聲調卻變得高起來，看來牠也像青春期的我一樣在刻意壓低聲線。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPA6rJBvgM
「原來你識講口語…」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6XTtJihDr
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZ8ANFLeHa
「改夠未呀煩膠？」貓神大力用權杖撞落地上，我感覺到地面澎澎作響。我有點出奇貓神也懂得「煩膠」這個用語，貓界也有兩登嗎？446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfg31JsSNcK
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjLkCHxakj
「今次真係最後…」我說，「如果你個咒語搞到我變咗女仔，咁我去咗女神屋企咪英雄無用武之地，所以我繼續要係男仔，而且每晚都要同女神一齊瞓！」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUAYMBCnB9n
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLGyjPGvWp
「『煩膠阿日由聖誕開始將會與女神敏青同居、同睡。其間敏青將會視阿日為最愛，而阿日將保持雄性身份。』，此乃第一個願望，未許之願還剩兩個。貓貓貓貓貓貓貓貓貓貓…」貓神再次壓低聲線，用力念着咒語。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRQ8OPWI7YX
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwgRYcIZZzl
「貓貓貓貓貓貓？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXV62vVzFa4
「雄性？點解係用雄性呢個字唔係用男仔？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2AR6ddWw9q
「原來仲有兩個願望？」446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRYlFwmNq3B
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjejbb7C7f6
很多問題浮在我的腦海，我嘗試大聲叫出來，卻有如黑洞一樣的力量在拉扯着我的身體以及腦袋，然後把我的聲線完全給進無底深潭內。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUHQQw4KAW
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtM67JG6tz
四肢好像沒有辦法發力一樣，心臟停止跳動，身體各個器官都出現前所未見的劇痛，感覺就像貓神走進了我的身體內，然後用權仗把我的世界劃破再重新裝坎。就像遇見了死神一樣，卻又突然被賦予重生的感覺。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACcqepHsHk
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXIHXi5im9B
如果還有兩個願望的話，我寧願不許，也絕對不想再經歷兩次這種痛楚…446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNsGcd58hZd
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqS1WIoZcBx
我在睡夢中醒來。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmQVLNtizJ
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIO95YUwnbO
我突然想起，那股在剛才那個夢境以及名將壽司中出現過的香味是什麼。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTRpXuonuJg
446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEkmpSjyErA
是過期罐頭裏的吞拿魚。446Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNdyQqCAAzD
and then Add to home screen.