
天亮,上班。941Please respect copyright.PENANA5ypFufaPoR
941Please respect copyright.PENANAX00qUtoD3b
擠進人山人海的車廂,心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物,我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟,好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。941Please respect copyright.PENANAypbvPY09xw
941Please respect copyright.PENANAgYjSehiEdq
車廂一如往常,平穩中帶輕微搖晃,教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲,繼續進食,令人側目。941Please respect copyright.PENANAixuLXyZhEZ
941Please respect copyright.PENANA6WsTFp2lOY
食物的細碎,像沙子一樣,在人們毫不注意的情況下,悄然掉在地上,再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站,人們再肆意加以踐踏,令碎粉再度粉碎。941Please respect copyright.PENANAtgG4fXyUQw
941Please respect copyright.PENANAT15DzpaBgL
到站了,我有意無意地繞過人羣,「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉,心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上,我回頭望進車廂,想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉,但列車經已開駛。941Please respect copyright.PENANA402s1TDUjU
941Please respect copyright.PENANA8arTJrEgZi
看不見,罷。
天黑,下班。941Please respect copyright.PENANAxtKuos4WRI
941Please respect copyright.PENANAzTYHbwSAJl
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂,繼續講上司的壞話。941Please respect copyright.PENANAbCZBpd8C6x
941Please respect copyright.PENANA59F5Ijh1dp
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。941Please respect copyright.PENANAIQylG4rps7
941Please respect copyright.PENANAvpQO3BBWo6
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不!有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰?我看不見……我不想看見……941Please respect copyright.PENANAzNhOpxTczf
941Please respect copyright.PENANAKG99rxws1j
「啪」的一聲,男同事一手拍在我的小腿上,那隻螞蟻——扁了。941Please respect copyright.PENANATlRyWUPpMz
941Please respect copyright.PENANAjhx2fCb4h0
「沒事了!」他笑了笑,問我:「你很怕小昆蟲?」941Please respect copyright.PENANAlSSEvwy2UB
941Please respect copyright.PENANAb5cTRCvFMu
「不,只是怕蟻。」我感覺到,我的唇還在顫抖,但卻仍勉力一笑。
公司,午飯時間。941Please respect copyright.PENANAPu9QVz534s
941Please respect copyright.PENANAu1GbQVwYP9
甲小姐正在上網看劇;乙先生在打盹;丙小姐外出吃飯去;丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒;戊小姐……941Please respect copyright.PENANACrv2sxgKRL
941Please respect copyright.PENANAb8exOc7rYh
看著同事們的百態,我突然覺得自己和他們一樣,都是很渺小的生命體,小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事,尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌,不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎?那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別?941Please respect copyright.PENANAWTjt44LLbV
941Please respect copyright.PENANAGVnpLk0ZMs
驀地,我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過,卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上,讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失,我感到自己也消失了似的。
其實,真正的我只是一隻螞蟻,不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己變成人類,過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活,是有目的的付出,有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑,多奢侈!無他,這就是意義。941Please respect copyright.PENANAdywp0VlK34
941Please respect copyright.PENANAPUgEZlnHP8
還是……941Please respect copyright.PENANAgAvyx2EbgF
941Please respect copyright.PENANAWVXon1Sop7
其實,真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢,幻想自己是一隻蟻,過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味,只懂一味尋找食物。無他,這就是生存!
公司,工作。941Please respect copyright.PENANAAHLveZNA3t
941Please respect copyright.PENANALR1WTNz79V
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。941Please respect copyright.PENANAki4e53YpBk
941Please respect copyright.PENANAtIahuWFk0b
大家心知犯錯的不是我,奈何人是怕事的,只好把我推上斷頭台。事後,一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。941Please respect copyright.PENANAZiSlJpEoOF
941Please respect copyright.PENANARusxWJBKfN
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。941Please respect copyright.PENANARw0wnHvk5x
941Please respect copyright.PENANAbl9LEFzZwt
剛巧,一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。941Please respect copyright.PENANAWY7xN5IpQP
941Please respect copyright.PENANA5PwL8jV9DH
快意,笑了。
酒吧,喝酒。941Please respect copyright.PENANAK0ZpRrr07K
941Please respect copyright.PENANAVTVdr7Qh3M
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎?為何現在也怕酒起來?」男同事笑問。941Please respect copyright.PENANApz5bon8Giw
941Please respect copyright.PENANAnAWoFkIfBM
「其實,我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。941Please respect copyright.PENANAqMtMIydzHl
941Please respect copyright.PENANATXrfzazm2B
「還是……你根本不會喝酒?」他哈哈大笑。941Please respect copyright.PENANAk6q1ug27HL
941Please respect copyright.PENANAOhUiJjw0a3
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲,我突然變得不大抗拒,乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。941Please respect copyright.PENANATeIM2xCtNS
941Please respect copyright.PENANA2SKHsW9KVV
醉倒。941Please respect copyright.PENANA68wRB4I6WM
941Please respect copyright.PENANA0yfyJiw67U
迷糊間,我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體,不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲,想要到它的洞穴去……941Please respect copyright.PENANAyYojTOvE9D
941Please respect copyright.PENANAzuQdnoRps9
「上天取走你的一扇門,定會留給你一扇窗。」941Please respect copyright.PENANAFz4LzFwmYT
941Please respect copyright.PENANAcOklxVpmp0
今趟,上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。
假期,醫院。941Please respect copyright.PENANAebKM0cLpCy
941Please respect copyright.PENANAZSbHqzzTQY
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病,還未明確,因為報告要待下星期才會完成。941Please respect copyright.PENANA6hbZIq6jLQ
941Please respect copyright.PENANAHV3VxapnUu
看見媽的時候,家中各人都是淚眼漣漣,很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。941Please respect copyright.PENANAdGlGmMRnjG
941Please respect copyright.PENANAYugmzoOoVH
「我覺得……」近幾天,媽的話都變得斷斷續續:「自己……」941Please respect copyright.PENANAj6LY94q1wi
941Please respect copyright.PENANA4nLhwUnRcP
大家都屏息靜氣,深怕這是她的最後一句話。941Please respect copyright.PENANAF8E1zWsUdj
941Please respect copyright.PENANAh77mJR4v2p
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音,輕如柔絲,但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。941Please respect copyright.PENANAJznzlicy2K
941Please respect copyright.PENANAmDILQTsQTG
死寂。941Please respect copyright.PENANAO7Vi31Z6JM
941Please respect copyright.PENANALlzllGZe6h
出乎我意料,這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話,不論是肉體還是心靈上。
回家,晚飯。941Please respect copyright.PENANAUQsaIFjpkE
941Please respect copyright.PENANAJliPHCbWiA
一枱六椅,異常的沉默。電視的聲浪,掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意,繼續吃。941Please respect copyright.PENANAT0rixTjqEz
941Please respect copyright.PENANAvy8nXld0iw
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子:「不如外出吃飯。」941Please respect copyright.PENANAkAKEmNcshW
941Please respect copyright.PENANAXs4EO3Elkz
妹放下筷子衝進房內,甩門;姨低下頭來,但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見;婆呆了,眼眶紅潤;我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。941Please respect copyright.PENANALR2XF37k9i
941Please respect copyright.PENANA2baktAORzo
我心想:世界末日來臨後,地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻?
每次望著媽,心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣,彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。941Please respect copyright.PENANA1gzS0zYTbM
941Please respect copyright.PENANAqULB14cI5o
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑!就是因為她是一隻螞蟻,所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭,去減輕她的負擔。941Please respect copyright.PENANAzJGUUvpF9Z
941Please respect copyright.PENANAcyALthQI0L
久而久之,我每次一見到她,便會掉頭走。941Please respect copyright.PENANAWUMvIzcG0v
941Please respect copyright.PENANA3phvWsoSTu
但我知道,我永沒能走遠。
男友家,床上。941Please respect copyright.PENANA402bvF7xkK
941Please respect copyright.PENANAUZrmuQ6Nui
前奏後,男友進入極度興奮狀態,沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時,我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。941Please respect copyright.PENANA1ONNvamI1X
941Please respect copyright.PENANAlXcd84wuYV
産房內有一張床,床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了,是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示,她要生産了。不消一會,整張床上都是幼蟻,恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。941Please respect copyright.PENANAOM8E2lmdtM
941Please respect copyright.PENANAPdIDJ69d1u
我驚恐萬分之際,耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音:「他朝君體也相同!」941Please respect copyright.PENANAhmYONjnt3S
941Please respect copyright.PENANAKwxj0wcSCd
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮,於是更用力……
舊生聚會,內地某酒家。941Please respect copyright.PENANAZ7MEnZ2I0k
941Please respect copyright.PENANACaWmasE4H4
說也奇怪,舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意,說會給我們驚喜。941Please respect copyright.PENANA5xdjwJkfGn
941Please respect copyright.PENANAWmGEw4moAq
「蟻宴?」我呆了,但逃不了。941Please respect copyright.PENANAqRV3XRfuoS
941Please respect copyright.PENANAfW4pcF98Uk
「你有收看《天與地》嗎?」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。941Please respect copyright.PENANAaSGQLP4XYn
941Please respect copyright.PENANA18JJS30P7n
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼!」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。941Please respect copyright.PENANAngqWBvuTen
941Please respect copyright.PENANAgKNKggUu15
「結局何如?」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。941Please respect copyright.PENANAvjF5ReKreI
941Please respect copyright.PENANAlDwNWEpZW0
「沒好下場!」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。941Please respect copyright.PENANAk8XmZGYOiV
941Please respect copyright.PENANAAQpfbcrsLx
「對!沒好下場!」我在心裡重覆著,衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。
男友有很多恐怖的寵物:蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時,他都會放一些寵物在床邊,以增加他的性趣。941Please respect copyright.PENANAiEdHxfpYe3
941Please respect copyright.PENANAQMXu55YajG
今趟,床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後,我不經意的問道:「你的寵物呢?」941Please respect copyright.PENANAsJaO0N9hrN
941Please respect copyright.PENANAflutwRg92f
「在你體內。」941Please respect copyright.PENANA4F4eXbr95E
941Please respect copyright.PENANArdB08gzzXq
「甚麼?」941Please respect copyright.PENANAfUJChkBEca
941Please respect copyright.PENANAOACNuBi38W
「蟻。」
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。941Please respect copyright.PENANATbA75ZnesM
941Please respect copyright.PENANAkjVLq94LUQ
它平常會做甚麼?做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯,它會做的事真的很多,但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活!它最好立刻消失!941Please respect copyright.PENANAgibClZdVom
941Please respect copyright.PENANAZqfPaLtRgT
結果,我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。
靈堂上,我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。941Please respect copyright.PENANAHtjFZAVk1C
941Please respect copyright.PENANAm9eXs4sFVR
「她真的死了嗎?」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊,但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。941Please respect copyright.PENANATnsokOUzCh
941Please respect copyright.PENANAUCDRB7Upm6
「誰?」另一聲音反問。941Please respect copyright.PENANA03zyXvH2NK
941Please respect copyright.PENANA6hRSkEqWFl
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道:「她……」941Please respect copyright.PENANAvPdDk40uzo
941Please respect copyright.PENANAsxQKJjDJJ4
靜。941Please respect copyright.PENANAz4jiD0Q14R
941Please respect copyright.PENANAmGIHg6krPK
我回過神來,低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。
我:「我的耳朵有毛病嗎?為何會聽到螞蟻講話?」941Please respect copyright.PENANAoWxA9fK1N2
941Please respect copyright.PENANAhmoSAkAlGX
醫:「不。是你的壓力過大,導致有幻聽。」941Please respect copyright.PENANAWomyKsDZR6
941Please respect copyright.PENANAHPc8ck77PE
我:「我有精神病?」941Please respect copyright.PENANAQFVhQSj39X
941Please respect copyright.PENANA9gg5dSo7cT
醫:「是情緒病。」941Please respect copyright.PENANAaA7JTwTPVM
941Please respect copyright.PENANAGTc4wf1XxR
我:「怎麼辦?」941Please respect copyright.PENANAhZjF1bBXPt
941Please respect copyright.PENANAjemmgQmsrF
醫:「我會處方一些藥物,你要按時服用;另外,你也要多休息……」941Please respect copyright.PENANAzeI52Xp8d9
941Please respect copyright.PENANAcvvmsLmFCZ
我:「謝謝醫生。」941Please respect copyright.PENANAuKWFMDtQqX
941Please respect copyright.PENANA0mq1oO7TIC
醫:「不用謝。」941Please respect copyright.PENANAq6Zy3Y9hCm
941Please respect copyright.PENANAiEEOeHzfBL
離開診所時,我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。941Please respect copyright.PENANAT9JBvogLMm
941Please respect copyright.PENANA4odT1HkWHf
不,我走近細看,是「虫馬虫義」專科。
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻?941Please respect copyright.PENANAqWzxM2XjFw
941Please respect copyright.PENANAfTqablhatY
醫生替我作身體檢查,一切正常;941Please respect copyright.PENANAYW2Ze6poq2
941Please respect copyright.PENANA2nhLDVYQnO
男友向我解釋,螞蟻之說,純粹幽默;941Please respect copyright.PENANA1gIqwY3x5S
941Please respect copyright.PENANACYSx2uvm9M
同事都勸我休息,減少工作量;941Please respect copyright.PENANAYSi0uXiuUK
941Please respect copyright.PENANARxgZHt3USP
……941Please respect copyright.PENANA1z1m9FVqgj
941Please respect copyright.PENANAwYqOV6c1Qk
「真的有蟻在我體內!」我尖叫,奪門而出,從天台一躍而下,肝腦塗地。941Please respect copyright.PENANAvIqJUuUmUY
941Please respect copyright.PENANAjLcwY5OnLj
臨死前,我看見那東西了——不是蟻,是……