同學們面面相覷。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddb3YHnhRF
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqdB7AHbJHv

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMPU342p0K
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3B2Q2toOP0

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpi2CrBRSN
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBj04tZgEp

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5HI6tBZvC
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQIrKKqvvj

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZS96TQJwy
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVoTJJEMlA8

「那改成老不羞好了。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa22eOoSxUq
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5TtVZTFHt

「更糟糕了啊！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHh1TW5SaLI
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wh1jYFXpE

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyLgYJoCHFV
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtSrw3R6Bjm

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUznXyNxqlW
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09IQzau8Jj

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsJ9s0Sfbw
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ2RVyk3ODh

「老師，它正在暖身。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlO0NR4OSe
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO3v560ayFT

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3aKGwPmRE8
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOVY5s41vJ

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOVeMxQCW9
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3hfCEDqeN

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbAlrDDUSg
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0u97Za8bK

「那我改姓三岐。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YdDskczR4
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4GgV58rMi

「才不是這個意思！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyfuYP2OUUM
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2yYAYmszql

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcHyB2N4LK
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYVnQLIvh4

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZDBsglMbq
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGY0ccx6j9

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMQEa99EL8
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfkgPrnaak

「元帥好弱。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1CgnP5GxuC
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskNVC2HZWf

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNklhpLEESb
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Kxr5TXq8q

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8KLMbVzdaQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1MurUzVIF

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFno4yFRGG
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0C3BPgAgWI

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4gC3VArJyc
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgiE2T6PwcL
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHZQ5lUnif

「老師！別中計啊！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡInzMgeY4yn
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlCZkahk25

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj3jFwtcs8A
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VZvU8jNOz

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIdCckaChr
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTggZl3wtw

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpufXyNSHxI
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMvazMnc4U

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZD40ZfEJW
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmmpHBmck0

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnYapFXLjuP
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDcIi6cESv

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiwWAah7KCS
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJaYPTJdgv

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkB6h1dKTkw
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTyK9zOoeDd

「什──」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy426Jw4WFU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yYW2fhq92

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyYWbiIKv7
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO5oyCXraYW

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEwdbzVuqu
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7vOPT5v7H

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡauWMJs1t15
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tFMPmA6rf

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8H1d2nqpY8
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Fdqttf4O8

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe4L16oI7oU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOaWsXTmHJ

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGTCsBQ3d4r
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6OUewIpGCC

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUo1n4kA3vU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI8uFOJ9MVj

    賴妍歪頭。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmuHRqMSYj
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmkXJuCsnw

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKSxAlmWbmh
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOa1DUTMQw

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡknUVLeW48G
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLkpDhnAwSB

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadqwEFnioI
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXyiEyJT2F5

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdUomLpY04Y
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUaCKI1kvW

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitkJwZsix1
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2c4iNLXH0U

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzJ2gWVhal
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaUEUo3USV

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIoYUhMF57
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lu9dVddl8

「一加一等於二。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoFc3ScxS7
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmLgdJKHzW

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACT0ZUBWdd
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3POzuS3O7

「……咦？」老師愣住了。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8vzs5jS5W
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡniUMwn7hxI

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5VKYqOerO
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRJQEcAHH9

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbjzSoiO8b
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2lIrPFq4U

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ziNPM7nSX
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡike6wSrn7f

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhC9ilTh9Wu
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6MnD4wdLn

    完蛋了。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3CK1I0riF
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NldH79aNX

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyK6toHJ9x
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMFvK1Pr6lm

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQ2Jh3hz8i
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlneRMpRq9E

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzx2wiiRCNw
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWUhBTjOqI

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK5DM4pfhpg
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpvxH6VZHG4

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuUNS62vsr
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgcUPKR4lyS

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh9lXU0yls0
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rJJHOolyZ

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3ijFzP2lq
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXtdAseLn0

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbVsNH2meKU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRAtMJvLRsC

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtrXC6M6ENQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtzO14UC7QT

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTAk51YyIt
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9St9hzENnG

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7F8JxovKuR
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR4SR1RWsfi

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeo5ttUExV4

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKdISu15ED
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8CgEAXh08q

「同學！一加一等於多少！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5etjYNGyS2
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhKJ4BvJt17

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfz908sp2hw
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIxkuzP3xW

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrXplZNVNwO
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxsNkPA7Jwl

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0L0cgHnk4
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG2sDM6QQxE

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhZivM75fC
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAkUfXHkQb1

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbXLsVnB6Z
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvvYryW6UNW

    全班盯著三岐。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6IglE0ELA4
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JYECV44cW

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ScgZUd7Di
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8bFJNvhex

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3w5TcB4rOs
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIo67662kGL

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ8UUPqHcaS
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr6Tt5rzBRR

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNWGvBZEiP
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqeg5TNeRWK
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0rfVhzwe7G

當日結果：357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8wIZev4BX7
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq9WyqL1ym0

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFWHCQPCsL
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvlzPrz3DhR

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEMv2W8jdO
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhv4xqHdVd

    柳困依然單身。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlsqmGFl93d